Communicating in Interpersonal Relationships Chapter 11

1
Communicating in Interpersonal Relationships (
Chapter 11)

• The relationship is the communication bridge
  between people.
• Alfred Kadushin, University of Wisconsin

2
Social Exchange Theory

• ProfitsRewards-Costs
• Preferred relationships are that give you the
  greatest rewards with the least costs.

3
Comparison Levels

• We have expectations going into a relationship,
  based on our perceptions.
• Most couples expect high levels of trust,
  respect, love, and commitment.

4
Equity

• If we feel we are doing more, we expect more
  rewards.

5
Communication that Creates Positive Relationships

• Relational Messages
• Other Orientation
• Empathic and Positive Responses
• I Messages
• Active Listening
• Remember Irreversibility
• Open Channels

6
I Messages

• Take responsibility for feelings and thoughts.

7
Relational Messages

• Look for messages that clarify motivations and
  needs.
• Consider non-verbal as well as verbal

8
Other Orientation

• Exchange perspectives and see situation as your
  partner does.

9
Empathic and Positive Responses

• Practice this approach, and use it even in
  conflict.

10
Active Listening

• Help your partner explore and express relevant
  thoughts and feelings.

11
Remember Irreversibility

• Cant take back what has been said

12
Open Channels

• Be available to discuss problems and negotiate
  solutions.

13
Repairing Relationships

• Recognize the problem
• Engage in Conflict Resolution
• Pose possible solutions
• Affirm each other
• Integrate solutions
• Risks

14
Rules for Maintaining a Friendship

• Stand up
• Share information
• Emotional support
• Confide and trust
• Help in time of need
• Others happiness
• Dont criticize in public
• Keep Confidences
• Avoid jealousy
• Respect Privacy

15
Romantic Rules

• Acknowledge each others individual identities
• Similar attitudes, beliefs, values, interests
• Enhance self worth and esteem
• Open and genuine
• Loyal and faithful
• Shared time
• Rewards based upon investments
• Magic/Intangible

16
Rank the Rules

• Which friendship and romantic rules are most
  important? Why?
• Rank them as individuals first.
• Then try to come to a group consensus.