How to Avoid, Handle, and Solve Conflict

1

• How to Avoid, Handle, and Solve Conflict

By Shawna Strickland and Jordan Weimar
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• Communication is the basis for any relationship.
  
  
• Keep it positive by talking to your roomie before
  things get unbearable. Youll be surprised how
  much better it will go!
  
• If you feel like you need help starting the
  conversation, see your RA.
  
• Dont forget to talk anything and everything, not
  just when there might be a problem. Roomies are
  friends, too!

3

• Realize that youre both sharing a very small
  space.
  
• If your roomie comes to you about something, try
  to see it from their point of view as well.
  
• COMPROMISE is necessary from both sides. Youll
  need to give some thought to what you can
  improve, too.
  
• Try to give all situations a win-win outcome.
• Remember, youre in this together!

4

• Remember those contracts you wrote at the
  beginning of the year? Take a moment to revisit
  those or create a new one.
  
• Respect your roomies boundaries, both within the
  room and in lifestyle.
  
• Youll both make new friends, and remember to
  respect your roomies new pals, too.

5

• If youre an early bird, considering leaving a
  small light on at night and being understanding
  of a late sleeper in the morning.
  
• If youre a night owl, come back when youre
  ready to settle in for the night. Avoid bringing
  fellow night owls over after roomies bedtime.
  
• For both, try to avoid hitting Snooze too
  often.
  
• Remember to turn your alarm off on the weekends,
  too.

6

• No one likes a faker. After all, who likes Paris
  Hilton?
  
• Be yourself no matter what. It will make
  addressing the issues easier in the end.
  
• Learn to appreciate the differences in your
  personalities. Opposites attract, right?
  

7

• Every roomie has some awesome stuff, but remember
  to ask before touching.
  
• Its important to actually abide by equitable
  division of goodies if youre splitting the
  expense.
  
• Before wearing your roomies favorite shirt to a
  hot and sweaty club, think how youd feel if you
  didnt get it back for weeks.

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• Okay, so were not talking abstinence, just
  boundaries.
  
• If roomie is present, tone down the PDA.
• Avoid sexiling your roommate. No one likes to be
  in the lobby alone at two in the morning.
  
• Define what is ok in terms of overnight visitors,
  and respect those terms.
  
• Split up the fun between your room and your
  significant others place, too.
  
• Practice safe sex, but dispose of the evidence.

9

• Devise a plan to switch trash duties, then stick
  to it.
  
• Dont let one person get stuck with the dirty
  deed, whether its taking out the trash and
  recycling or vacuuming the room, etc.
  
• If you need to clear space in the bathroom for
  the custodian, remember to take care of your own
  stuff.

10

• When a room smells more like a dumpster than a
  living area, its a bad sign.
  
• Try to avoid dirty clothes everywhere. Nothing is
  less exciting than stepping on dirty underwear.
  
• If you want to be messy, try to keep it on your
  side of the room.

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• Do unto others as they want done unto them.
• Know that everyone does things differently, from
  handling conflict to eating their cereal.
  
• Respecting these differences and treating your
  roomie as they want to be treated will set you
  both up for a positive experience.

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• Thank you for using this bulletin board! Jordan
  and I both hope that you will find it helpful and
  useful on your floor. Please let us know if you
  do post the board its always nice to hear about
  its success!
• Shawna slstrick_at_holly.colostate.edu
• Jordan and I are both second year RAs in Parmelee
  Hall at Colorado State University in Fort
  Collins. (Fall 2008)

At RA training, summer 2008. 80s workout theme
day!