Dealing Positively with Parents

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Dealing Positively with Parents

• Jamie Wilson, Assistant Superintendent, Denton ISD

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Objectives

• Develop an effective, proactive system of
  communicating with parents.
• Be able to apply effective communication skills
  when dealing with parents.
• Be able to deal with parents in a positive,
  respectful, and confident manner.
• Keep the students best interest in focus.
• Be aware of the parents role and perspective.

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Dealing Positively with Parents

• What do I need to know about the families of my
  students?
• How can I involve parents in a positive way?
• What do I need to remember about dealing with
  parents?
• How will I first contact parents to inform them
  about my class?

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What do I need to know about the families of my
students?

• Cultural, social, and economic make up of the
  families in your school.
• Families want the best for their students
• Work from the premise that they care.
• Parental Love is unconditional, parents cannot
  always be objective.
• Usually defensive, may become offensive if they
  think you might hurt their kid.
• Not a normal person about those we love.
• Best interest of their child at all times. ALL
  the children.

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Communication

• The earlier the better, make the first contact
  positive.
• Letter to students and their parents the first
  day of school, to be signed and returned.
• Welcome information introducing your self.
• Goals for student learning
• Rules and procedures
• Instructional materials
• Invitation to visit/conference
• Other?

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Activity 1-Sample Letter

• Overhead for sample
• In groups of 2 or 3, spend the next 15 minutes
  drafting your letter.
• Be sure to include the information from the
  previous slide.
• Always have another person proof your letter.

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What Parents Expect

• Know my child
• Set up clear expectations
• Know your stuff
• Be available, keep me informed
• Let me know how I can help
• Provide a safe learning environment
• Promote success for my child
• Provide fair and consistent discipline
• Alert me if my child is struggling
• Ask my advice about my child

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Different Kinds of Parents

• Over Involved Helicopter
• Under-Involved
• Over-Familiar
• Over-Impressed
• Blame You
• Overwhelmed
• All of the above!

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Over-Involved helicopter

• Will not leave the room, want to tell you how to
  do everything.
• Give them specific tasks and times
• Meet them at the office/door
• Involve them in tasks away from the room
• Seek help from the office or your mentor
• Talk about rescuing, and the effects

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Under-Involved

• Never shows up for conferences.
• Will not return calls or letters
• Document your attempts to contact, certified mail
  if needed.
• Dont give up. Keep trying.
• Dont punish the child for the parent
• You may become the parent

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Over-familiar

• Wants to be your friend, calls you by your first
  name.
• Calls you at home inappropriately.
• Wants personal information
• Be professional
• Call that person Mr. or Mrs., especially in front
  of the children
• Never give information to a parent about anyone
  other than their own child.
• Avoid rumors and gossip
• Let them know when you are available

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Over-impressed

• Thinks his/her child deserves special treatment.
• Has an unrealistic view of their child
• Listen, but be clear about expectations
• Send home enrichment work, or stretch assignments
• Give parents areas to assist their child
• Challenge

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Blames You Parent

• Blames any problem their child has on you.
• Insists that you are the only teacher their child
  has a problem with.
• Wants you to solve all social and academic
  problems.
• Meet with parent with another school employee in
  attendance
• Document accurately
• Have colleagues observe student

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Overwhelmed Parent

• May be single, unemployed, over employed, etc.
• Be compassionate
• Modify schedule to accommodate parent
• Tell parent how to help

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Contacting Parent by Phone

• Date/time of call, phone number, etc.
• Begin with Statement of Concern
• Describe the behavior associated with the call.
• Describe the steps you have taken so far to solve
  the problem.
• Get parent input
• Present Solutions to the problem
• What you will do
• What you want the parent to do
• Express confidence in the problem being solved.
• Tell parents there will be follow-up contact from
  you.

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Choosing Words Activity

• In groups of 2 or 3, please determine another
  choice of words rather than the negative words
  provided.

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Contact Information

• Jamie Wilson
• Assistant Superintendent
• Secondary Academic Programs
• Denton Independent School District
• jwilson_at_dentonisd.org
• 940-369-0032