The Two Faces of Conflict Dealing with Conflict

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The Two Faces of Conflict - Dealing with Conflict

• Judy Clark, SPHR, CPC
• HR Answers, Inc.
• www.hranswers.com

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On Conflict...

• Conflict is simply any situation where one
  persons concerns are different from another
  persons.

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Continuum of Conflict
Cool Lukewarm Warm Hot Boiling
Individual Discussion Mentally Upset Grievance/
Lawsuits Impact Review Angry Departure
Conflict
Business Project Proj/Rel Proj/Rel Proj/Rel Proj
/Rel Missed Impact Progress Slows Stalls Road
blocks Setback Business Opp./No
Recovery
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Organizational Structure

• Differing goals
• Ambiguous jurisdictions
• Differentiation
• Conflict of interest
• Dependency
• Status

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Organizational Behavior

• Leadership style
• Low self-esteem
• Unresolved prior conflicts
• Participation

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What Makes Someone Difficult?
A. Difference in style B. Difference in
belief C. Difference in expectation D. Difference
in language E. Difference in orientation F. Person
al differences
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Five Conflict Handling Responses
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Avoiding

• When the goal is not important and the
  relationship is of little importance, use
  avoidance. This is being non-assertive, passive
  and not actively seeking cooperation. You may
  refuse to engage openly in conflict.

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Avoiding (cont.)

• Goal Low
• Relationship Low

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Accommodating

• When the goal is not important, but the
  relationship is, use accommodation. One is
  nonassertive and cooperative. This is the
  opposite of competing. This person neglects
  their own concerns in order to satisfy others

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Accommodating (cont.)

• Goal Low
• Relationship High

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Competing

• When the goal is very important and the
  relationship is not, use competition. This is
  being assertive and uncooperative, pursuing your
  own concerns at the expense of another. You wish
  to gain power by direct confrontation. You are
  trying to win arguments without adjusting to
  others goals and desires.

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Competing (cont.)

• Goal High
• Relationship Low

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Compromising

• When both the goal and relationship are
  moderately to highly important and you realize
  you wont get your way, use compromise. This is
  an intermediate position that partially satisfies
  both parties.

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Compromising (cont.)

• Goal Moderate to High
• Relationship Moderate to High

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Collaborating

• When both the goal and the relationship are
  highly important, use collaboration. When high
  assertiveness aimed at reaching ones own goals
  gets tempered with high concern for the other
  person, this is the style we see.

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Collaborating (cont.)

• Goal High
• Relationship High

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Behavior Circle
ThreateningEvent

• Emotions
• I can cope or
• Anger
• Fear
• Anxiety
• Depression

Personal Conclusions About Event
Powerless vs. Powerful
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People Feel Threatened

• Evaluated
• Controlled
• Manipulated
• Ignored
• Talked down to
• Treated dogmatically

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Three Approachesto Resolving Conflict
POWER
POWER
RIGHTS
RIGHTS
INTERESTS
INTERESTS
Distressed Process
Effective Process
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• Anger is always the second emotion.
• The key to problem resolution is to determine the
  first emotion.

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Agree Upon Solutions

• WHAT actions will we need to take to implement
  the agreed-upon solution(s)?
• WHO will be responsible for the specific actions?
• WHEN do we expect to accomplish these actions?
• HOW will these actions support successful and
  constructive resolution of the problem/issue?

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Key Learnings

• Identify 3-4 key learnings gained from this
  workshop.
• Determine any challenges you foresee in applying
  these learnings.
• What immediate BOTJAs can you apply?

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• Questions?
• Comments?

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Thank you!