Positive Solutions for Families

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Positive Solutions for Families

• Using the CSEFEL Parent Training Modules

Presenters Pam White, Southern Oregon Head
Start Kelly Carter, Southern Oregon ESD / Early
Childhood Services
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The CSEFEL Parent Training Modules
Developing a Plan to Address Challenging
Behaviors in the Home
Targeting Social Emotional Skills Development
Strengthening Parent-Child Relationships
Creating Supporting Home Environments
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Positive Solutions for FamiliesSix Sessions

• Session 1 Making a Connection!
• Session 2 Making it Happen!
• Session 3 Why Do Children Do What They Do?
• Session 4 Teach Me What to Do!
• Session 5 Facing the Challenge (Part 1)
• Session 6 Facing the Challenge (Part 2)

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Whats Happening TodaySession 1

• Meet each other and learn about our families
• Discuss goals and ground rules we might have for
  our group
• Discuss the importance of building positive
  relationships with our children
• Discuss the power of using positive comments
  and encouragement with our children
• Review Things to Try at Home

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Session 1 Making a Connection! Building
Positive Relationships with Children
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Topics ActivitiesSession 1

• Activities
• Positive relationships
• Quality time
• Relationship Tank/Bank
• Positive Encouragement
• Tip Sheets
• Goal Setting for things to do at home.

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Filling/Refilling ActivityWorkbook Activity 2

• List 5 things that you will try to do in the next
  week to fill/refill your childs relationship
  tank. Things that will make your child feel
  really special! Things that will help build a
  positive relationship with your child.

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Tips for Encouraging Your ChildPowerful
Parenting Practice!

• Tip 1 Get your childs attention.
• Tip 2 Use behavior specific language.
• Tip 3 Keep it simpleavoid combining
  encouragement with criticism.
• Tip 4 Encourage with enthusiasm.
• Tip 5 Double the impact with physical warmth.
• Tip 6 Use positive comments and
  encouragement with your child in front of
  others.

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Encouragement Log ActivityWorkbook Activity 3

• Try to encourage your child at least 5 times this
  week! See handout in workbook.

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Ways to Give Children Encouragement

• Thank you for __________.
• What a good problem solver you are, you were
  able to__________.
• Its so much fun to play with you you are so
  good at ________. (sharing, taking turns)
• You were being so kind when you ________.
• Thank you for using your inside voice when your
  sister was sleeping.

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Things to Try at HomeMaking the Connection!

• Positive Parenting Tips
• Try to fill/refill your childs relationship tank
  (Workbook Activity 2)
• Try to use positive comments and encouragement
  with your child (Workbook Activity 3)
• Have fun together!

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Session 2 Making It Happen!

• Whats Happening Today?
• Share your Things to Try at Home activities.
• Discuss the use of play as a powerful
  parenting practice.
• Discuss ideas for helping your children
  develop friendship skills.
• Link positive comments, encouragement, and play
  to childrens behavior.
• Review Things to Try at Home activities.

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Topics ActivitiesSession 2

• Following Your Childs Lead
• Play Practice Tips
• Activity Goal Setting for play at home
• Friendship Skills
• Activity Helping Your Child Learn to Play and
  Make Friends
• The Power of Encouragement and Positive
  Comments

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Session 3 Why Do Children Do What They Do?

• Whats Happening Today?
• Share your Things to Try at Home activities
• Determining the meaning of behavior
• Making our expectations clear
• Developing household rules
• Review Things to Try at Home activities

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Topics ActivitiesSession 3

• Observation understanding the meaning of
  behavior
• Time-Out Common Mistakes
• Make Your Expectations Clear
• Activity Whats a Better Way to Say?
• Rules for Rules with examples
• Activity What do you think about these rules?

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Help Me Be Successful!Teach me what to do!

• Show and Tell
• Practice Makes Perfect
• You Got It!

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Session 4 Teach Me What To Do!

• Whats Happening Today?
• Share your Things to Try at Home
• Discuss fun strategies and ideas that you can use
  to teach your child what to do
• Emotional Literacy
• Controlling Anger and Handling Disappointment
• Problem Solving

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Emotional Literacy Why How Controlling
Anger Disappointment Tools Feelings
Charts Songs Games Childrens
Literature Tucker the Turtle Problem
Solving Steps Solution Cards Take home
Activities Set goal for teaching emotional
vocabulary and continue observation.

• Topics ActivitiesSession 4

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Feelings Charts In English Spanish


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Songs and Games
If youre happy and you know
it Add new verses to introduce new feeling
words If youre happy and you know it, hug your
mom (or dad)! If youre sad and you know it, cry
a tear Boo hoo! If youre mad and you know
it, use your words Im mad! If youre scared
and you know it, get some help, HEEELLLLPPP!
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Childrens Book NookWorkbook Handout 15
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Turtle TuckWorkbook Handout 18

• Step 1 Recognize
• that you
• feel angry.

Step 2 Think, Stop.
Step 3 Go into shell. Take 3 deep breathes.
And think calm, coping thoughts.
Step 4 Come out of shell when calm and thinking
of a solution.


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Tucker Turtle Takes Time to Tuck and Think

• A scripted story to assist families with
  teaching the Turtle Tuck
• By Rochelle Lentini
• Adapted for Families September 2006

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Turtle Box
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Problem-Solving Steps

• Help Your Child Think of Possible Solutions
• Get an adult
• Ask nicely
• Ignore
• Play
• Say, Please stop
• Say, Please
• Share
• Trade toys/item
• Wait and take turns

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Session 5 Facing the ChallengePart 1

• Whats Happening Today?
• Share your Things to Try at Home
• Teaching Emotional Vocabulary
• Observations at Home

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Topics StrategiesSession 5

• Reasonable Expectations
• Logical Consequences Practice Activity
• Planning Ahead
• Choices Limited Reasonable Practice Activity
• First Then
• Redirection Physical, Verbal Redirection for
  Teaching
• If Your Child Doesnt Comply Do-WAWP

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If Your Child Doesnt Comply(Do-WAWP)

• State the Do direction.
• Wait for compliance (silently count to 5).
• Ask the child to restate the direction.
• Wait for compliance (silently count to 5).
• Provide encouragement or help.

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More StrategiesSession 5

• Catch You Child Being Good with Practice Activity
• Staying Calm
• Neutral Time
• Take home Activities
• Practice 3 Strategies we talked about this week

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Session 6 Facing the ChallengePart 2

• Whats Happening Today?
• Share your Things to Try at Home
• Strategies you tried out last week
• Discuss strategies to deal with challenging
  behavior that continues even though you are using
  all of the parenting practices discussed in
  earlier sessions

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Topics StrategiesSession 6

• Challenging Behaviors What is the childs
  behavior telling us?
• Practice Activity with case study scenarios
• Examine the Situation Angelo
• Behavior Can Mean Many Things
• Developing a Plan Prevention, New Skills New
  Responses
• Video Testimony
• Family Routine Guide

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Challenging Behavior Works!

• Remember!
• Children engage in challenging behavior because
  it works for them!

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Examine the Situation

• Clues to figure out the meaning of behavior can
  be found in 3 things
• What happened before the behavior
• What the child did
• What happened after the behavior

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Angelo
Before

• Angelos mother tells him that it is time for
  dinner. She begins to guide him to sit in his
  chair. He falls on the floor, begins kicking and
  screaming, and shouts, No! His mother tells him
  to stop and tries to pick him up. He kicks her,
  and she sends him to
  his room.

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Angelo

• Angelos mother tells him that it is time for
  dinner. She begins to guide him to sit in his
  chair. He falls on the floor, begins kicking and
  screaming, and shouts, No! His mother tells him
  to stop and tries to pick him up. He kicks her,
  and she sends him to his room.

The Behavior
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Angelo

• Angelos mother tells him that it is time for
  dinner. She begins to guide him to sit in his
  chair. He falls on the floor, begins kicking and
  screaming, and shouts, No! His mother tells him
  to stop and tries to pick him up. He kicks her,
  and she sends him to his room.

What Happened After
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Behavior Can Mean Many Things!

• I want you to pay attention to me.
• I want that (toy, food, paint, etc.).
• I want to play with you.
• I dont want to stop what I am doing.
• I dont want to clean up!

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Developing a Plan

• Three Essential Parts
• Use PREVENTION strategies to try to keep
  challenging behavior from happening.
• Teach your child new ways to communicate or NEW
  SKILLS for participating in routines or
  expectations.
• NEW RESPONSES Make sure your childs challenging
  behavior wont work for him/her.

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Prevention

• Try to minimize the possibility that your child
  will have challenging behavior!
• Simplify the task.
• Explain what will come.
• Make your child comfortable.
• Use a job chart.
• Show a picture.
• Reduce distractions.
• Offer help.
• Prepare the activity ahead of time.
• Make the activity fun!

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New Skills

• Ask for a turn.
• Ask for an object.
• Ask for an activity.
• Ask for help.
• Ask for a hug.

• Ask to leave.
• Say, No.
• Say, I dont want to.
• Make a choice.
• Follow a schedule.

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When We Cant Honor the Meaning of the Behavior
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New Responses!

• Make sure your plan includes new ways for you to
  respond to your childs challenging behavior.
• Example
• You need to sit in your car seat, but you can
  hold your bear or hold your blankie.

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Family Routine Guide

• Getting Dressed/Undressed
• Brushing Teeth/Hair
• Meals/Snacks
• Play
• Outside Play
• Clean-up
• Riding in the Car
• Shopping

• Restaurants
• Going to the Doctor
• Taking Medicine
• Taking a Bath
• Bathroom Time
• When Parents Cant Play
• Transitions

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Family Routine Guide
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Adapting the Modules

• Four Session Parenting Class Series
• Single Topics for Parent Meetings
• Newsletters Handouts for Parents
• Other ideas

Questions or Comments?
Coming Next Year Modules for Home Visitors