Friendships

1
Friendships
2
Qualities of Friendship

• Terms to know clique, loyalty, reciprocity
• All friendships are different
• The qualities we look for in a friendship varies
  from person to person

3
Cont.

• Strong relationships have certain qualities
• Common interests
• Loyalty
• Empathy
• Dependability
• Reciprocity
• Forgiveness
• Caring

4
Making Friends

• Relationships are complicated
• Meet people that have the same interests as you
• Start a conversation with someone you dont know
• Ask open-ended questions
• Pay attention to what they are saying and respond
• Avoid controversial topics

5
Cont.

• Taking the next step
• Call them
• Make plans to hang out
• Handling rejection
• Can be painful but happens to everyone
• Dont change yourself to make others happy
• Not every friendship is meant to be

6
Cont.

• Keeping friendships strong
• Make time for each other
• Be honest
• Trustworthy
• Always working to make it better

7
Teen Friendships

• Friendship groups
• Help shape who teens are
• Who teens spend most of their time with
• Cliques
• Small exclusive group
• Tends to people who share the same values and
  interests
• Are cliques a good thing??

8
Cont.

• Friends of different ages
• Helps broaden teenagers understanding of
  themselves and the world around them
• Growing apart
• Dont always survive the changes teenagers go
  through
• People change

9
Friends for Life

• Having a lot of friends is not as important as
  having a few (1or 2) good friends that are there
  for you no matter what
• Friendships should help you grow as a person
• Strengthen your character
• Learn to give to others (sharing)
• Make you a better person overall

10
Responsible Relationships
11
Friendships

• Typically, most relationships start out as
  friendships
• First step to a serious relationship

12
Relationships

• Learn to care at a more personal level
• May have sexual pressures
• Wonder about the expectations of the other person
• Complicated

13
Going Out

• Wanting more than a friendship
• Age of readiness is not the same for everyone
• go out for specific reasons

14
Establishing Rules

• Parents set up the rules
• They dont want their teens in situations that
  are beyond their ability and control
• Dont want teens to be involved in serious
  relationships so they dont lose sight of
  important goals
• If you were a parent, what rules would you set?
• What concerns would you have?

15
Spending Time with a Group

• Going out usually begins in groups
• Safer
• Helps people to relax and have a good time
• Less nervous
• Dont always have to keep a conversation going

16
Going Out as a Couple

• Going in groups helps people to be comfortable
• Eventually they go out as a couple
• Going out with others helps to learn about others
• Going out with only one person gives a person
  security
• Often the relationship ends
• Lose a lot of opportunities to meet other people

17
Commitment

• When two people decide they dont want to see
  other people and stay true to each other
• State of obligation to each other and a
  dedication to making the relationship work

18
Marriage

• Success is often determined before the marriage
  takes place
• Some people dont spend enough time getting to
  know their partner
• Usually takes at least a year or more to get to
  know someone
• Skills and effort are needed to make marriages
  work as well as communication and conflict
  resolution

19
Cont.

• Not everyone wants to marry
• Marriage is a choice, not an obligation
• May find career, travel, or community service
  more fulfilling

20
Teen Marriages

• Not all make this commitment seriously
• Roughly 70 of teen marriages end in divorce
• Still a time of change
• Teenage years are full of experiences that dont
  happen when people get older, missed because of
  the marriage

21
Handling Emotions

• A high level of attachment can stir intense
  emotions
• Love and infatuation
• how will I know when Im in love?
• Love is needed by two people to make a
  relationship last
• Love is based on caring and a desire to work
  towards common goals
• Requires giving and taking
• Communication
• Trust

22
Cont.

• Many people are infatuated with someone, not in
  love
• Love lasts, infatuations dont
• How to tell the difference?
• Is the relationship based on more than physical
  appearance?
• Is the feeling based on the total person?
• Is concern for the other persons well-being and
  happiness important?
• Has enough time been allowed to tell?

23
Crushes

• Intense, short-term feelings of fascination that
  are usually not returned
• The feelings will fade with time

24
Stalking

• The ending of a relationship or crush may end
  with problems
• Unwelcomed pursuit of another
• Refuses to acknowledge that the relationship is
  over
• Calls repeatedly, constant letters, following the
  person, loitering around their home
• Contact police if this occurs

25
Jealousy

• Typical in relationships
• Feeling that the person you care about is more
  interested in someone or something else
• A little bit of jealousy is normal out of hand,
  it is destructive
• Extremely jealous people are insecure
• Best way to handle it is to talk about it
• Understand that the person has needs that the
  relationship can not fulfill

26
Anger

• Can threaten a relationship
• Common in relationships
• When anger is felt, physical actions are NOT
  allowed
• Verbal responses are not allowed
• Physical and verbal attacks happen because the
  person does not know how to communicate
  effectively or how to solve a conflict
• Dont let anger build over time, just as
  destructive

27
When Relationships End

• Unreasonable to expect a person to find a life
  long mate without ever trying other relationships
• Breaking up can be very painful and difficult
• Read information on page 198

28
Sexuality and Responsibility

• Opinions and values differ
• Need to be realistic and know about the
  consequences of their actions
• 3 out of 10 high school girls that get pregnant
  get a degree by age 30
• Regrets can cause guilt
• New relationships may be harder to form
• Reputations can suffer
• Sexually Transmitted Diseases
• Some are treatable, not all

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Real Pressures

• Why take risks?
• Physical pressures
• Television shows
• Movies
• Explicit images
• Peer pressures

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Strategies for Handling Sexual Feelings

• Think ahead
• Make a plan for abstinence
• Practice refusal skills
• Make your own choice (dont let someone else
  influence your choice!!)
• Self-control
• Can still show affection, express it differently

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Pride in Yourself

• Feel good about yourself
• Stand up for your personal values
• You are smart enough to make wise decisions on
  your own

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Teen Parenting
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Teen parenting

• Not mature enough emotionally, physically, or
  financially to take on responsibility of
  parenthood
• More likely to abuse/neglect their children
• Have low paying jobs
• Need to finish school
• Dropping out will not provide opportunities for
  experience and training needed to get a better job

34
Physical Concerns

• Bodies are still growing
• Babies tend to be born premature or have low
  birth weight
• Endanger a females body
• More likely to develop toxemia or anemia

35
Planning Ahead

• Not planning ahead hurts the parents and the
  child
• May give baby a poor start to life and may not
  foster the childs growth and development needs
• Talk to partner about responsibilities and
  consequences

36
Open Books to page 161 (White Book)

• Write one sentence summaries for each of the
  following sections
• Health risks
• Academic risks
• Emotional risks
• Social risks
• Economics
• Child care
• Neglect and abuse