Conflict Resolution

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Chapter 5

• Conflict Resolution

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(No Transcript)
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Conflict Important

• Conflict is the internal or external tension that
  occurs when you anticipate difficulty meeting
  important needs.
• Boss, spouse, child, etc.

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Conflict Types

• Five leading causes of conflict in the workplace
• Misunderstanding-miscommunication
• Disrespect or disregard for other people
• Conflicting egos
• Impatience
• Fear and insecurity over loss of control

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Conflict Types

• Pseudo conflicts (false conflicts)
• Not real conflicts they are perceived.
• Two causes faulty assumptions and false dilemmas
• Faulty assumptions mistaking assumptions for
  facts
• False dilemmas people only see two solutions to
  a problem
• Fact conflicts
• Parties disagree about information that could
  easily be verified
• Fact conflicts can turn into ego conflicts

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Conflict Types

• Ego conflicts
• A dispute centers on status or power
• Initial argument may be over a factual question
• Conflict centers on who has the right facts
• Value conflicts
• Focus on personal beliefs
• Value rights, religion, etc.
• Need conflicts
• Needs of one individual clash with the needs of
  another

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Conflict Management Styles

• Avoiders
• See conflict as hopeless and useless
• Are impersonal or distant
• Remove self mentally or physically
• Lack commitment to finding solutions (time,
  energy, confidence or skills)
• Be an Avoider to buy time, to defuse strong
  emotions, if the conflict isnt worth it

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Conflict Management Styles

• Accommodators
• Believe conflict is destructive
• Overvalue maintaining relationships
• Undervalue own needs
• Dont make waves
• Want peace at any price
• Be an Accommodator when the issue isnt that
  important to you or when conceding is easier

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Conflict Management Styles

• Forcers
• Believe winning is the only thing
• Love challenge and achievement
• Express anger when others dont agree
• Are willing to sacrifice others who dont agree
• Typically use emotional appeals, strong
  deliveries and persistence
• Be a Forcer when decisions have to be made
  quickly, crisis

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Conflict Management Styles

• Compromisers
• Believe half is better than none
• Want each side to gain something
• Use voting or bargaining to decide
• Avoid the real issues
• Typically use maneuvering, negotiating and
  trading
• Be a Compromiser disagreement isnt vital

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Conflict Management Styles

• Collaborators
• Believe both parties can meet their needs
• See conflict as a natural way to meet needs
• Want to hear the needs of others
• View the other as equal in conflict
• Be a Collaborator when there is time, if both
  parties are willing to work together

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Conflict Strategy Guidelines

• Recognize the enemies that can limit your
  ability to manage conflict effectively.
• Your desire to explain your side first
• Failure to listen attentively
• Fear of losing control, what you value
• Misconception that one must win and the other
  must lose

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Conflict Strategy Guidelines

• Choose the right time.
• Relaxed, free from distractions and prepared to
  spend time
• Take turns speaking and listening.
• Listen open-mindedly rather than defensively
• Paraphrase one another
• Encourage active listening

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Conflict Strategy Guidelines

• Set the stage for finding a solution.
• Work collaboratively
• Brainstorm
• Identify your needs and those of the other
  person.
• Keeps you focused on the issue
• Identify the needs
• Be empathic

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Four-Part Assertion Messages

• Plan what you want to say.
• Four-Part Assertion Message
• Describe the behavior
• Identify your feelings
• State the tangible consequences
• Make a request
• Example When you take personal calls on your
  cell phone while there are customers waiting in
  line (behaviour), I feel stressed (feeling),
  because I have to cover the service desk by
  myself (consequence). Would you please wait until
  your break to use your cell phone? (request).

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Be Assertive

• Assertive
• Stating what you think, feel, want or need in a
  way that is direct, honest and respectful of
  others
• Builds trust, helps prevent conflicts, gets needs
  met
• Most conducive to a supportive style of
  communication
• Aggressive
• Stating thoughts, feelings, wants or needs
  directly and honestly but disrespectfully
• Can prevent conflict by fostering avoidance

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Be Assertive

• Non-Assertive
• Respecting others while stating your thoughts,
  feelings, wants or needs indirectly or not at all
• Avoid conflict, easy to please, cooperative team
  players
• Cant get needs met, may feel resentful

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Conflict Strategy Guidelines

• Express appreciation.
• Thank the other person
• End the discussion on a positive note

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Responding to Criticism

• Three types of criticism
• Manipulative
• Vague
• Valid

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Responding to Criticism

• Fogging
• Use for manipulative criticism
• Presents a non-defensive, indifferent response to
  criticism
• Seeks to acknowledge the criticism
• Does not agree or disagree

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Responding to Criticism

• Negative Assertion
• Strongly agrees with valid criticism
• Admits mistakes
• Announces that the critic is right
• Adds what you have learned from the mistake
• Expresses a sad, regretful tone

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Responding to Criticism

• Negative Inquiry
• Clarifies the intent of vague criticism
• Shares a puzzled, confused tone
• Seeks further information
• Uses questions