Empathic Listening

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Empathic Listening
Slideshow created with reference to
BeyondIntractability.org
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What is Empathic Listening?

• Empathic Listening is a way of listening and
  responding to another person that improves mutual
  understanding and trust.
• Why are understanding and trust important in any
  relationship?

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Benefits of Empathic Listening

• Builds trust and respect
• Allows for emotional release
• Reduces tension
• Creates a safe environment for the other person
  to express his or her feelings
• Helps clarify a persons thoughts
• Is helpful with problem solving

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How to be an Empathic Listener

• Actively attempt to understand the other persons
  point of view
• Listen without passing judgment
• What does it mean to judge another person?
• Pay full attention to the other person
• Give the other person enough time to share their
  problem and concerns

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Empathic Listening DOs

• Make eye contact
• Be attentive
• Use appropriate responses, such as encouragers
• Reflect your understanding back to the speaker
• Be interested in what the other person is saying.

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Empathic Listening DONTs

• Change the subject
• Look around while the other person is speaking
• Interrupt
• Cross your arms or give other non-verbal cues you
  arent listening
• Give advice
• Brush off the other persons feelings (e.g. Why
  would you be so upset about that??)

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4 Listening Styles

• Encouraging
• Using neutral words to help another
• person say more about the situation and how
  they feel.
• You must have been so angry when she said that
  to you.

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4 Listening Styles

• 2. Restating
• Saying in your own words what you thought you
  heard the other person say, including their
  feelings and needs.
• I hear you saying that missing the bus this
  morning made you stressed and anxious when you
  werent sure how youd get to school.

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4 Listening Styles

• Clarifying
• Getting more information, asking nonjudgmental
  questions.
• You said seeing your ex- boyfriend/girlfriend
  with his new girl/boyfriend makes you really
  angry. Is that right? Can you tell me more
  about how that makes you feel?

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4 Listening Styles

• Empathizing
• Imagining what it feels like to be in someone
  elses shoes.
• Watching your brother leave for college must
  have been really sad for you.

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How do I help the other person keep talking??

• Encouragers
• uh-huh..
• I see.
• Oh, really?
• Go on
• Door Openers
• Id like to hear more..
• Tell me more about that.
• Give me an example
• How did that make you feel..?