Spouse Drinks And Doesn’t Come Home

1
Spouse Drinks And Doesnt Come Home
One of the problems people often bring up in
support groups is that of spouses who stay out
late or dont come home. People are often lost
and dont know what to do about this situation.
They dont know how to handle their spouses, so
they reach out to people who have seen this type
of behavior in the past and might have some
insights. People like me. Now, Im not a
psychotherapist or a relationship counselor, just
a former drunkard. But Ive participated in more
support therapy sessions than I can count, so
Ive heard it all. There are two events people
usually want to discuss, so were going to
approach them separately. Spouse Drinks With
Friends And Stays Out Late Now, this is the most
common problem. You get home and you know your
spouse should be home in an hour or two as well.
You decide you want to surprise them, so you
prepare an awesome meal for you two. You make a
fast trip to the supermarket and buy ingredients,
wine, everything you need. You start cooking,
when all of the sudden you get a text informing
you that your wife or husband will be late
because theyre going out with friends. Youre
furious. You put in so much effort in your meal
and now its not worth it. I understand. I was
actually the one sending the text in this
scenario. Heres the deal. Being in a
relationship shouldnt be the end of your
individual time. You should still be able to
have a drink with friends once in a while. I
would even recommend it. But you shouldnt be a
dick about it, either. If youre going to text
your significant other that youre going out
with friends, you could invite them too. They
might need a night out as much as you
do. Still, I understand the need to have some
friends of your own. People who are not friends
with your spouse. I get it. And spending time
with them is important. You reminisce about years
gone by, have a few drinks, and relax. Its all
harmless fun. Not letting your spouse know about
your get together in time is not cool, but still.
The experience might do you good. However, this
behavior becomes problematic if youre doing it
often. Your spouse worries about you, especially
since youre drunk every time you get home. If
your spouse does this on a regular basis, I
suggest you have an honest conversation about
his or her behavior. Make a list of whats
bothering you and see how you two can work
things out.
2
Spouse Drinks And Doesnt Come Home
Now, this is where things get serious. If your
spouse fails to come home on a regular basis,
you really have a problem. I dont know you or
how your relationship is going, but thats
usually a bad sign. Heres why. First of all,
spending the night at friends is a sign of
disrespect. I mean, if this happens once, its
OK. Your wife or husband might have gotten drunk
and spent the night at a friends house to
recover. However, if he or she does it often,
thats a problem. In my opinion, that shows your
spouse would rather spend their night with
someone else than with you. You dont want that
in a relationship. And one of the problems
people have with their spouses spending the night
somewhere else is infidelity. If your spouse
spends several nights per month at a friends
house, he or she might be enjoying the so call
friends hospitality more than you would like.
Thats not unheard of. As a matter of fact, most
of those who complained about their spouses
drinking and spending the night out on a regular
basis later found out their spouses were cheating
after all.
Alcohol Is Not The Problem Here. Cheating Is
Your spouse might or might not have a drinking
problem. He or she might enjoy drinking with
friends, and theres no problem with that. But
when your husband and wife prefers spending the
night with someone else than you, that becomes a
problem. Even if they spend the night at friends
without being romantically involved, thats still
not OK. What I find amusing is that these people
- those who spend their nights God knows where -
these people will be the first to say that the
booze made them do it. They drank so much they
couldnt get home. So they spent the night at a
friend. As I said, if this happens once, its
probably not a problem. But if it happens often,
it probably is. I was a drunkard and I had
drunkard friends. We would often stay out late
drinking by ourselves, without our wives or
husbands. But at the end of the night, all of us
would get home. Because in that advanced state
of intoxication, all we could think of would be
our beds and the people in them. If your
husband or wife fails to come home, they do it
because they want to. Alcohol does not make you
do anything you didnt want to do in the first
place. Sure, alcohol might loosen
3
you up and lower your inhibitions, but at the end
of the night, youre still in control. Youre the
one making the calls, not the booze in your
bloodstream.
How To Act If Your Spouse Drinks And Doesnt Come
Home
If your spouse drinks and doesnt come home, you
should try discussing his or her behavior.
However, I would recommend going to couples
therapy sessions. Having someone to mediate your
discussion might help, and the couples therapist
might give you helpful suggestions or pointers
on how to handle the situation. Read the rest of
the articles in this series if you want to find
out what happens in the mind of an alcoholic. In
our next article, were going to talk about
spouses who drink and gamble. Stay sober! Read
more on official site here https//www.freddyget
salife.com/when-your-spouse-doesnt-come-home-after
-drinking/