Lesson 4 Behavior Modules

1
Lesson 4 - Behavior Modules

• Assess your own level of self-esteem
• Are you easily hurt by criticism?
• Are you very shy or overly aggressive.?
• Do you try to hide your feelings from others?
• Do you fear close relationships?
• Do you try to blame your mistakes on others?
• Do you find excuses for refusing to change?
• Do you avoid new experiences?
• Do you continually wish you could change your
  physical appearance?
• Are you too modest about personal success ?
• Are you glad when others fail ?

• Do you accept constructive criticism?
• Are you at ease meeting new people?
• Are you honest and open about your feelings?
• Do you value your closet relationships?
• Are you able to laugh at your own mistakes?
• Do you notice and accept changes in yourself as
  they occur?
• Do you look for can accept new challenges?
• Are you confident about your physical appearance?
• Do you give yourself credit when credit is due?
• Are you happy for others when they succeed?

2
Lesson 4 - Behavior Modules

• When you feel good about yourself, handling peer
  pressure is a lot easier.
• Use this checklist to see how well you can handle
  peer pressure.
• Do you like and respect yourself ?
• Do you know your strengths and weaknesses?
• Do you trust yourself?
• Do you know what values are really important to
  you?
• Do you know how to make your own decisions?
• Do you hang out with friends who accept you for
  who your are?
• Do you know how to say NO to peer pressure?
• Do you know how to handle different kinds of
  pressure situations?
• Do you take responsibility for your decisions?
• Do you take time to think before you act?

• Learn to be your own best friend. Its one of the
  keys to handling peer pressure.
• Make your own decisions.
• Tell others your decision. This can be difficult,
  but you can make it easier on yourself.
• Know how to resist peer pressure.
• Ask for help if you need it.
• Know you values and act on them.
• Take the time to make a good decision and
  consider all the consequences.
• Dont let your peers decide for you.

3
Lesson 4- Behavior Modules

• Most people feel bad about themselves from time
  to time. So, when you answer these questions,
  think about how you feel most of the time.
• If you answered MOST of these questions yes
  your self-esteem could probably use some
  improvement.
• If you answered NO to any of the questions on
  peer pressure, your ability to handle peer
  pressure could be improved.
• If you answered MOST of theses questions with
  yes you probably have a healthy opinion of
  yourself.
• Whatever the level of your self-esteem now, you
  can take positive steps to IMPROVE IT!

• Tips for Handling Peer Pressure
• Look and act confident - - even if you feel
  nervous or scared.
• Stand or sit up straight.
• Look right into the persons eyes.
• Speak firmly and clearly, in your normal voice.
• Heres what you say when you decide to say NO
  to peer pressure
• No, thanks.
• I.m not interested.
• Ive got something else to do.
• I dont feel like it.
• Ive decided not to do that anymore.
• If you continue to be pressured, you can say
• No, please dont ask me again.
• I already said, NO . Why are you still
  bugging me ?
• Ive got to go. Then just walk away.

4
Lesson 5 - Communications

• This lesson emphasizes the importance of good
  listening and speaking skills.
• When people meet you for the first time, they
  formulate opinions of you by your appearance.
• How many times have you heard someone say, I
  dont like her/him and they dont even know you?
• Your appearance, the manner in which you speak
  and how you act all play an important role in how
  you speak.
• In order to be a good speaker, you must first be
  a good listener.
• Listening is a skill many people do not possess.

• When you meet someone for the first time, it is
  important to listen for their name and any
  questions they may ask you about yourself.
• This if part of the impression formulation
  process.
• How many times have you been engaged in a
  conversation and you are cut-off or someone
  finishes your statements for you?
• Being a poor listener and taking while others are
  talking can be projected as being rude.
• We all have two ears and one mouth which means we
  should listen twice as much as we speak.

5
Lesson 5 - Communications

• Tips for Active Listening
• Maintain eye contact and calm body language.
• Dont interrupt.
• Dont just listen to the words, listen to the
  feelings and meaning.
• Test your understanding by paraphrasing or
  summarizing what you heard before you respond.
• Ask questions to clarify or confirm your
  understanding.
• Acknowledge his/her feelings. Use you
  statements such as you seem frustrated or
  concerned about , etc.
• State your own feelings. Feelings and emotions
  need to be dealt with before dealing with the
  content of the discussion.

• Tips of Active Listening
• When possible have a face-to-face meeting.
• Stay relaxed in your overall manner, show you are
  comfortable in the situation.
• Listen for feelings was well as content.
• Read - between the lines .
• Dont confuse content and delivery - dont assume
  the other person has something to say, even if
  he/she is having trouble saying it.
• Avoid distractions - choose a comfortable and
  quiet place for your meeting.
• Avoid time pressure for your meeting
• Dont jump into the conversation too soon.
• Use simple gestures or phrases to show you are
  listening.

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Lesson 5 - Communications

• Tips for Active Listening
• Keep and open posture - dont cross arms and
  legs.
• Cultivate empathy for the other person- try to
  put yourself in his/her place.
• Pause a few seconds before giving feedback - you
  both need time to think.
• Give the other person time to correct a mistake
  or statement. This shows respect.
• Observe the non-verbal behavior.
• Ask questions beginning with What or How -
  avoid questions with yes or no answers.
• State your own feeling. Feelings and emotions
  need to be dealt with before dealing with the
  content of the discussion.

• Tips for Active Listening
• Remember listening is one of the hardest
  things you will learn to do in this life.
• Its important to offer immediate feedback,
  playback those specific things that youd like to
  discuss further or need clarification of.
• Communicate clearly and candidly avoiding
  vagueness, mixed messages and confusion.
• Deal with his/her defensiveness, helplessness,
  exuberance, frustrations, enthusiasm and other
  emotions.
• Listen non-judgmentally for full understanding
  when he/she discusses problems, ideas and goals.

7
Lesson 5 - Communications

• Dos And Donts of Good Speaking Skills
• Dos
• Project your voice.
• Have good posture
• Enunciate your words and word endings properly.
• Keep good eye contact with the person or persons
  you are speaking to.
• Avoid nervous movement or gestures.
• Keep objects out of your mouth such as pens,
  pencils or gum
• Use good grammar.
• Be relaxed
• Present what you say in a logical manner.
• Smile and maintain a friendly facial expression.
• Listen carefully to questions.
• Be specific in answering questions.

• Dos and Donts of Good Speaking Skills s
• Donts
• Chew gum while speaking.
• Use too many hums.
• Talk too slowly or too fast.
• Frown, cringe your fact or make annoying sounds.
• Keep objects in you hand that can be distracting.
  
• Juggle change in your pocket.
• Lean over the desk or chair.
• Dont sit on your foot.
• Dont rock back and forth on your chair.
• Be rude or discourteous when speaking.
• Remember COMMUNICATIONS IS
• NOT A ONE WAY STREET