PROFESSIONAL CHURCH WORKER FAMILIES

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PROFESSIONAL CHURCH WORKER FAMILIES
Blessed or Cursed?
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Count Your Blessings

• Shared Christian commitment and spiritual
  support.
• Unity of purpose in ministering to others.
• Nurturing support of congregation.
• High status. Respect in the community.

3
Count Your Blessings

• Wifes close identification with husbands work.
• Meet interesting people. Travel. Conferences.
• Opportunities for study. Training. Growth.

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Count Your Blessings

• Challenge to model Christian family.
• Ready-made community of friends.
• Counseling role satisfies. Gives insight.
• Flexible schedule aids family plans.

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Count Your Blessings

• Gifts and services from congregation.
• Creative work. Job security.
• Support from colleagues, denomination.
• Being change agents in church and society.

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Count Your Blessings

• Clergy husbands are specially helpful.
• Living standards acceptable.
• Receive strokes for good work done.
• Housing is often provided with the job.

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MINIMIZE THE CURSES

• Unreasonable expectations

• Time pressure

• Privacy fishbowl

• Money

• No in-depth sharing with other couples in the
  congregation

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MINIMIZE THE CURSES

• Children supposed to live according to
  congregations expectations
• Pastor serving others but neglects his own family
• Role expectations suppress humanness of pastor
  and spouse

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MINIMIZE THE CURSES

• Wife feels exploited by congregation
• Emotional stress caused by crisis situation
• Unfair criticism from congregation members
• Confusion about wifes identity and roles
• Dissatisfaction with housing arrangements

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MINIMIZE THE CURSES

• Frequent moves. No permanent roots
• On call 24 hours a day
• Family belongs to congregation
• Pastor works when others have free time
• Peer pressure to conform and compete
• No one ministers to clergy family

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AREAS OF MARRIAGE WHICH PCW COUPLES REPORT THEY
NEED HELP
AREA MALE FEMALE
Handling negative feelings (anger) 50 69
Communication in marriage 50 62
Family devotions 40 55
Resolving conflict 42 46
Expressing affection 37 32
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AREAS OF MARRIAGE WHICH PCW COUPLES REPORT THEY
NEED HELP
AREA MALE FEMALE
Social life 24 43
Child-rearing discipline 24 27
Sex life satisfaction 21 23
In-laws and relatives 5 14

• Husband-wife roles and status 19 14

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AREAS OF MARRIAGE WHICH PCW COUPLES REPORT THEY
NEED HELP
AREA MALE FEMALE
Money management 13 27
Decision making 16 20
Aged parents 13 19

• Separateness/togetherness 35 41

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WHAT CLERGY WIVES SAY THEY NEED
Need for time alone together 68
Understanding role of Pastors wife 48
Wifes Role in pastors counseling 44
Friends outside the church 40

• Wifes status in the church 39

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WHAT CLERGY WIVES SAY THEY NEED
Privacy in family life 32
Wife taking an outside job 31
Cooperation in household chores 30

• Cooperation in raising children 28

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DR. STINNETTS SIX QUALITIES OF A STRONG FAMILY

Strong families
show appreciation for one another
spend quality quantity time together
have good communication patterns
demonstrate high commitment
exhibit a high degree of religious orientation
have the ability to deal with crises in a
positive manner
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RECIPE FOR A HAPPY P.C.W. FAMILY

• Keep dating
• A good marriage takes hard work
• Dont confuse God with His church
• Set aside time in your calendar for your family
• Dont take your loved ones for granted

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RECIPE FOR A HAPPY P.C.W. FAMILY

• Spend time NOW
• Dont just talkcommunicate from the heart
• Learn to say no without guilt
• Keep your own family spiritually fed
• Take care of yourself
• Forgive as you have been forgiven