Counseling

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Counseling

• An Introduction

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Counseling What Is It?

• Assisting people to change or to cope with change
  that has occurred

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Counseling Ministry Gal. 61-2

• Caught the condition (sinfulness)
• Restore the mission (heart transformed)
• Gently the attitude/character (do no harm)
• Watch the protection (watch self
  ministry) see also I Tim. 416
• Carry daily goal (help bear burdens in
  personal relationships with people)
• See also Hebrews 51-4 Paul Tripp, CCEF

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Purpose of Counseling C2

• To enable persons to glorify God and to enjoy Him
  forever. (Westminster Confession of Faith,
  Shorter Catechism, 1)
• The central objective of all pastoral care and
  personal counseling is that Christ be formed in
  the personality of the individuals who seek
  help. (Oates, Christian Pastor, 3rd rev. ed, 77)

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Who Needs Counseling? CCEF

• Everyone! Including the counselor.
• Three reasons
• (1) Creation - because we are human need
  truth outside ourselves. God counseled
  Adam Eve before the Fall.
• (2) Fall presence of another untruthful
  counselor
• (3) Redemption the heart is deceitful, sinful

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A Biblical Model of Counseling

• Important Elements
• Goal to enable persons to glorify God enjoy
  Him
• Focus the Heart whole person
• Perspective/Agenda Gods, as defined in
  Scripture
• Value Holiness
• Practice Love (reflecting Gods character)
• Power Holy Spirit

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The Change Process in BC

• The Heart changed by Christ leads to Obedience
  Transformation, according to Gods will as
  revealed in Word and Spirit
• Obedience to Gods Word (change behavior via a
  changed heart)
• Maturing in Christ (i.e., that Christ be formed
  continually in ones personality or, renewing
  the mind)

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Counseling Faith Working Through Love

• A relationship of trusted motive prevails only
  when you as a Christian pastor voluntarily accept
  and effectively carry through with your power as
  a representative of the love of Christ. You are
  a servant of people for Jesus sake. The
  effectiveness of all pastoral procedures depends
  upon the singleness of this motivation, . . .
  (Oates, Xn Pastor, 78)

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• The focus of your pastoral identity and the end
  of your conversation with those whom you would
  serve is incarnate in Jesus Christ, the Word of
  God. Both you and those whom you would serve are
  on a pilgrimage of self-hood, the end result of
  which is either a self in Christ or a self apart
  from Christ. The encounter of redemption is
  initiated neither by the pastor nor by the
  parishioner but by God. (Oates, Christian
  Pastor,3rd, 82)

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• Every knowledge of the human heart, every skill
  in dealing with human problems, is as dangerous
  as it is useful, and ordinarily it is the
  presence or absence of the love of Christ that
  makes the difference.
• Wayne E. Oates, The Christian Pastor, 3rd ed,
  rev. (Philadelphia Westminster, 1982), 81.

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Effectiveness in Counseling

• The basic characteristics of a helping
  relationship are
• accurate empathy
• nonpossessive warmth
• inherent genuineness

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Effectiveness as a Biblical Counselor 1 CCEF

• Character Qualities
• Humility
• accurate self-assessment, flexibility of spirit
• Love
• encouragement hope, servant attitude
• Faithfulness
• dependability, discipline
• Spiritual Maturity
• personal holiness, Biblical/theological wisdom

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Effectiveness as a Biblical Counselor 2 CCEF

• Functional Qualities
• Building relationships
• gentleness, kindness, sensitive, peacemaking
• Understanding the counselees environment
• data gathering, uncovering heart issues, Biblical
  interpretation
• Communicating
• listening, other-centeredness, clarity presenting
  gospel
• Planning Action
• application, oversight/accountability,
  encouragement/admonition

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Some Assumptions in Counseling

• Sinfulness is assumed (gtgtgt brokenness)
• Distinguish between ultimate and penultimate
  concerns
• Repentance (change) is required when dealing with
  issues of personal sin
• Not all problems demand repentance as the central
  focus (support/encouragement)
• Restoration is not always possible

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Context for Effective Counseling

• Safe environment - safe, holding environment
• Comfortable - lighting air furniture tissues
• Confidentiality - white noise not alone
• Non-distracting Clock(s)
• Furniture Arrangement - extra chairs couch
• Forms Record-keeping
• Lending Library
• Referral Network in place

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9 Things To Remember About The Counselee

• Acknowledge hurdles many overcame just to contact
  you for help (self-image issues)
• Recognize risks exposure (vulnerability)
• Each seeks, needs, a place of security safety
  (Is. 421-4)
• Recognize that some, if not most, do not want to
  be there
• Be aware of the tension between request for help
  refusal of it

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9 Things To Remember, continued

• Each comes with ideas, assumptions,
  expectations that need to be explored (pastor as
  mind-reader, fix-it person, condoner of sin,
  etc.)
• The 1-to-1 relationship and total privacy may
  stir up intense and disturbing fantasy
  perception formations
• Gender issues warrant consideration
• Clear boundaries are essential. The counselor
  bears final responsibility for establishing,
  maintaining, rectifying appropriate boundaries.

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Assessment in Counseling with Adults 1

• Basic anxiety neuroses (disorder in how one
  thinks about oneself and ones life)
• Depression
• Psychotic (inability to distinguish reality from
  fantasy impaired reality testing)
• Neurological (organic mental disorder, mental
  retardation Alzheimers etc.)

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Assessment 1

• Spiritual the heart
• Psychological (mental, emotional, social)
• Medical
• Combination of the above

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Assessment 2

• Distinguish between
• CONTENT
• PROCESS

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Assessment 3

• CONTENT laundry list of items or
  complaints
• PROCESS the dynamics of the major
  issues the source of the laundry list
• Need to focus on both especially process.

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The Phases of Counseling

• Beginning
• Middle
• Ending

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The Phases of Counseling 2

• Beginning joining establishing rapport
  assessment
• Practice how you begin!!
• Middle changing ebb flow of progress
• Ending consolidating changes blessing
  termination

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Assessment The Magic ???s 1

• These questions are magic in the sense that
  they provide focus and perspective on almost any
  situation, enabling one to know at least
  something about how to deal with it.
• John Patton, Pastoral Counseling A Ministry of
  the Church. Nashville Abingdon, 1983, 90.
• Question 1 - What are you looking for?
• Focus communicates its their responsibility
• Perspective helps identify their needs

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Assessment The Magic ???s 2

• Question 2 - Why now?
• Focus identifies the urgency
• Perspective sense of hopefulness/possibility
• Things have changed and, thus, can change again

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Assessment The Magic ???s 3

• Question 3 - Why me and this place?
• Focus acknowledges the importance of the
  relationship
• Perspective identifies unrealistic expectations

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Assessment The Magic ???s 4

• Question 4 - What hurts?
• Focus the persons problem or concern
• Perspective listening stance

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How You Begin May Determine the Outcome
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Supportive Counseling 1

• The sustaining function of the cure of souls in
  our day continues to be a crucially important
  helping ministry . . . .
• William A Clebsch Charles R. Jaekle, Pastoral
  Care in Historical Perspective (Englewood Cliffs,
  NJ Prentice-Hall, 1964), 80, emphasis added.

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Supportive Counseling 2

• In supportive care and counseling, the pastor
  uses methods that stabilize, undergird, nurture,
  motivate, or guide troubled personsenabling them
  to handle their problems and relationships more
  constructively . . . .
• Howard Clinebell, Basic Types, rev. ed.
  (Nashville, TN Abingdon, 1984), 170.

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Supportive Counseling 3

• Supportive counseling is the primary approach
  used in crisis intervention and in bereavement
  (grief) counseling.
• A dependable, nurturing relationship (Oates
  relationship of trusted motive) is at the heart
  of the process.
• Danger development of unconstructive
  dependency

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Supportive Counseling 4

• Types of counselor responses/interventions
• Evaluative - judgment of behaviors, actions,
  attitudes
• Interpretive - informing teaching
• Supportive - reassurance to reduce anxiety
• Probing - gather more data questions
• Understanding - communicate empathy reassurance
  ()
• Advising - recommendations suggestions

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Never Underestimate the Effectiveness of . . .

• the Ministry of Listening

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Transference Dont I Know You??

• Transference the phenomenon of reacting to a
  person as if he/she is another person from ones
  past. A distorted and inappropriate response
  derived from unresolved unconscious conflicts in
  a persons past.
• (See Richard S. Schwartz, A Psychiatrists View
  of Transference Countertransference in the
  Pastoral Relationship in Journal of Pastoral
  Care 43 (1), Spring 1989, 41-42.)

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Transference Countertransference

• Transference refers to thoughts, feelings,
  attitudes, behaviors of the counselee toward
  the counselor or of the parishioner toward the
  pastor.
• Countertransference refers to the same process in
  reverse the pastors thoughts, feelings, etc.
  toward the parishioner.

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Triangulation

• Three people stuck in repetitive, malicious
  patterns of interaction. Issue 2 ?
• Luke 1213-21
• Teacher, tell my brother to divide the
  inheritance with me. (13)
• Common triangles encountered in ministry
  couples, parents children, church group
  conflict, issues, etc.

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Pre-Marital Counseling

• Purposes of PM Counseling
• Education
• Exploration
• Establish pastoral relationship of trusted motive
  for future
• Plan the wedding (worship) service

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Pre-Marital Counseling 2

• Recommend multiple sessions
• Explore families-of-origin (gives perspective of
  future dynamics of couple)
• Genogram, Taylor-Johnson Temperament,
  Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, PAI (Premarriage
  Awareness Inventory), SAI (Sex Awareness
  Inventory), PREPARE/ENRICH (Life Innovations,
  Inc.), etc.
• Contract for post-marital session(s) - in home

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The Genogram What Is It?
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A Genogram Whose Is It?
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Supervision, Consultation, Referral

• Supervision - too many Know-it-alls
• Consultation - too many Lone Rangers
• Referral - the ministry of introduction

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Certifying Organizations

• AAMFT - American Assoc. of Marriage Family
  Therapists
• AACC - American Association of Christian
  Counselors
• AAPC - American Association of Pastoral
  Counselors
• IABC - International Association of Biblical
  Counselors
• NANC - National Association of Nouthetic
  Counselors
• ACPE - Association for Clinical Pastoral
  Education, Inc.

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Lay Counseling Training

• Stephen Ministries
• Developing the Caring Community Alban Institute
  (10 week course)
• Communication (Listening) Skills
• Grief Training - H. Norman Wright Crisis
  Care Video Series

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Biblical Counseling Model (Crabb)

• ID problem feelings
• ID problem behaviors
• ID problem thinking
• Substitute Biblical Assumptions

• Affirm Spirit-feelings
• Plan carry out Biblical behavior
• Secure commitment to Biblical behavior