Optimal writing solutions to common writing problems

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Optimal writing-- solutions to common
writing problems
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Fragment

• Example The places that the company could
  achieve.
• Problem A sentence fragment is only part of a
  sentence, not a complete sentence. A complete
  sentence must have both a subject and a complete
  verb.
• Sentence Solution The places that the company
  could achieve include retail and corporate sales.

3
Fragment

• Helpful tests to see if you have a fragment
• Ask Who (or what) does?
• Can you turn the word group into a question that
  can be answered yes or no? If you can, the word
  group is a sentence.

4
Comma Splice

• Example However, that is where most of the
  problem lay, it was only a document that inspired
  investors and entrepreneurs to instigate the
  project.
• Problem Inappropriately joining what could be
  two sentences using a comma.
• Solutions Write as two sentences use a
  conjunction or use a semi-colon to separate the
  two separate statements

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Comma Splice

• Sentence SolutionHowever, that is where most of
  the problem lay it was only a document that
  inspired investors and entrepreneurs to instigate
  the project.

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Comma Splice

• Example The business plan is a technical
  document that describes what the company wants,
  how you plan to obtain those wants.
• Sentence SolutionThe business plan is a
  technical document that describes what the
  company wants and how it plans to obtain those
  wants.

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Passive Verb/vagueness

• Example They are also not creating critiques or
  comments but they introduce new things, methods,
  tests, IT professional markets, and other tips
  and hints to make a typical IT professional
  prepared for almost any situation during their
  work.
• The passive verb does not demonstrate an active
  relationship between the subject and the
  predicate. The noun buries the verb. The
  sentence is wordy.

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Passive Verb/vagueness

• Sentence SolutionThe magazine does not contain
  Op/Ed articles. They introduce new products,
  methods, and tests, explore IT professional
  markets, and provide tips to help IT
  professionals handle typical workplace problems.

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Verb Agreement/Passive Verb

• Example Murphy stated that the reason Bill and
  his colleagues were persuasive were that they
  were in the right business, at the right place,
  at the right time, with the right machine (12).
• Sentence Solution Murphy states that Bill and
  his colleagues persuaded investors because they
  were in the right business, at the right place,
  at the right time, with the right machine (12).

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Cliches/Idioms

• Example Microware had a promising young
  entrepreneur behind the wheel and they felt as
  though they were on the brink of something very
  explosive.
• Problem Overused idioms words lose their
  meaning and can convey triteness and a
  unprofessional lack of precision
• Sentence SolutionMicroware had a promising
  young entrepreneur leading the venture and
  investors were convinced the potential market was
  explosive.

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Cliches/Idioms

• Alternative Sentence Solution using active
  verbsA promising young entrepreneur led the
  venture and convinced investors of a market on
  the verge of explosive growth.

12
Mixed Sentence Construction

• Example This may help me because one of the
  qualifications of the company, The Everest Group,
  Inc., wanted to hire someone with great
  communication skills.
• Problem the sentence starts with one grammatical
  pattern but ends with another.
• Sentence Solution This may help me because one
  of the companys job qualifications is to hire
  someone with great communications skills.

13
Overstuffed Sentence

• Example The company must make sure to maintain
  a balance of objective and subjective information
  as to not skew the direction the company should
  take in terms of investments, as well as taking
  into consideration the interests of private
  investors.
• Too many ideas and details are crammed into the
  sentence making the ideas hard to sort and the
  sentence hard to understand.

14
Overstuffed Sentence

• The company must make sure to maintain a balance
  of objective and subjective information as to not
  skew the direction the company should take in
  terms of investments, as well as taking into
  consideration the interests of private
  investors.
• Sentence Solution To avoid bad investments, the
  company must balance its presentation of
  objective and subjective information. It must
  also consider the interests of private investors.

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Overstuffed Sentence

• Example This article explains how the previous
  poor setup of Southern Co. caused them to have
  major problems backing up their data in a timely
  fashion and their solution to the problem that
  brought them back into an excellent position as a
  power provider.

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Overstuffed Sentence

• Sentence SolutionThis article first explains
  the reasons the Southern Co. had major problems
  backing up their computer data. It then explores
  the solutions that helped them regain their
  position as an excellent power provider.

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Wordiness/Clutter

• Example My current plans for the future entail
  attending graduate school beginning in the fall
  of 2004.
• Problem Clutter words stretch a message
  without adding meaning (Lannon 260)
• Sentence SolutionI plan to attend graduate
  school in the fall of 2004.

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Wordiness/Overstuffed

• Example But due to its location on the site,
  and the intentions of the web site as a whole,
  yet more specifically the intentions of this
  article there is no reason not to believe that
  this is a qualified person that is just relaying
  information, even though the author is not
  named.
• Problem wordy phrases prevent a quick grasp of
  meaning. These phrases can be reduced to one word
  or eliminated all together. (see 254)

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Wordiness

• Sentence SolutionThe web sites credibility,
  the location of the article on the web site, and
  the purpose of the article ensure that the
  article is credible and the author is qualified
  to write it.

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Writing Problems Key

• Frag--fragment
• Cs-comma splice
• W--wordy
• Os--overstuffed sentence
• Mixed--mixed sentence construction
• Run-on/fused--two sentences wrongly combined into
  one sentence
• Evidence--you need to provide more specific proof
  to support your claim

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Writing Problems Key

• Wv--weak verb
• Av--need active verb
• Par--fault parallelism of elements in a list
• Awk--awkwardly worded sentence
• Punct/pct--check your punctuation