Boundaries In The Workplace

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Learning To Say Yes To Yourself Does Not Mean
Saying No To Others
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Why Are Boundaries Important?
People, like rivers, require boundaries. Without
a clear path that boundaries provide, water
becomes a flood and life becomes chaos.
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Webinar Objectives
By the end of this webinar, you will have the
tools you need to

• Define the place that boundaries have in your
  private and professional life
• Explain why boundaries are important
• Distinguish between appropriate and inappropriate
  boundaries
• Begin the process of setting and maintaining
  boundaries

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1. Make A List Of People Who Drain Your Time

• A great beginning point for establishing
  boundaries is identifying people that tend to
  drain your energy.
• When making your list, don't try to separate
  people by whether or not you like them. Sometimes
  even people we like the most can make demands by
  failing to respect boundaries.
• Try to be honest and only list the people that
  you know tend to drain your energy on a regular
  basis.

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1. Make A List Of People Who Drain Your Time

• Owners who
• Producers who
• Co-workers who
• Clients who
• People who are always in Crisis mode
• People who demand immediate attention
• People who are disorganized

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2. List Which Boundaries Need To Be Set

• Boundaries generally fall into three categories

• Your time
• Your world
• Your personal integrity

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2. List Which Boundaries Need To Be Set

• Your Time
• People who come to your desk and require
  immediate attention
• Your World
• i.e. Setting a regular time to go home at night
• Your Personal Integrity
• i.e. Making unrealistic commitments to clients

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2. List Which Boundaries Need To Be Set

• Producers who want things ASAP
• Clients with unreasonable requests
• Setting aside time for lunch and breaks
• Sticking to a set time to arrive at the agency
  and go home at night
• Setting aside time for Account Development

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3. Remind Yourself That You Have A Right To Set
Boundaries For Your Life

• You would never give keys to your home to a
  stranger. So dont give control of your life to
  others.
• Setting boundaries is not a selfish act. Just the
  opposite is actually true.
• Living by Conviction" rather than
  Circumstances" means you understand that respect
  for others begins by respecting yourself.

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3. Remind Yourself That You Have A Right To Set
Boundaries For Yourself

• Many people mistakenly believe that setting
  boundaries will upset or offend others. While
  some folks may not get what they want in the
  short run, you will gain respect from others and
  for yourself by standing up for your needs.

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4. Make A Short Affirmation To Describe Your New
Boundaries

• You will listen to your own words much more than
  the words of others. So give yourself something
  worth listening to.
• Replacing the tapes you listen to everyday
  requires time and practice. You owe it to
  yourself to make the commitment to begin thinking
  differently about yourself and your world.

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4. Make A Short Affirmation To Describe Your New
Boundaries

• Use whatever words are most powerful for you. Use
  an affirmation to remind you that setting
  boundaries is the right thing to do.

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4. Make A Short Affirmation To Describe Your New
Boundaries

• I am an insurance professional, and I have the
  right to act in a professional way with my
  co-workers and my clients.
• I do not have to live my life based on
  circumstances. I choose to live my life based
  on a conviction to do the right thing the right
  way.

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5. Rehearse Explaining Your Boundaries To Others

• Talk to yourself in the mirror, write in your
  journal, tape record yourself, or find a trusted
  friend to role-play with. This is new behavior.
  The more you practice it, the better you will
  become.
• An excellent way to make time for practice is for
  agency owners to schedule script practice
  meetings for all staff.

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6. Look For Win-Win Situations When Setting
Boundaries

• Setting boundaries is not punitive, and it is not
  about being mean to others.
• Boundaries create a healthy environment for
  everyone.
• Look for win-win situations by taking control of
  your time and your life.

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6. Look For Win-Win Situations When Setting
Boundaries

• I am not available right now. Can we schedule a
  time later this afternoon to discuss this?
• I will be glad to get this done as soon as
  possible. If you need it done quickly, I will
  need to put off what I am working on until later.
  Which do you prefer?
• Become a Broken Record

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7. Communicate Boundaries Without Anger

• You probably appreciate when others are
  respectful towards you, so always show respect
  for others when communicating boundaries.
• Be clear. Use language that feels comfortable to
  you. Keep in mind that you are saying "No" to an
  unreasonable request, not a person.

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7. Communicate Boundaries Without Anger
It is important to avoid gunny-sacking Gunny
sacking , or collecting offenses, occurs when an
individual passively when their boundaries are
overrun by others. Offenses and stress are
collected, then eventually explodes when one
last and final even t occurs. As a rule, the
triggering event is not extremely important, it
just caused the gunny sack to run over. Just
because someone asks a question, you are not
required to give an answer. Dont get caught up
in circular logic
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7. Communicate Boundaries Without Anger

• Practice using I messages rather than You
  messages.
• Practice Active Listening.
• Understand that just because you communicate
  appropriately, you have no guarantee that others
  will do the same thing.

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8. Relax!

• Before you set or enforce boundaries - Relax!
• Breathe deeply. Remember, you are simply saying
  "yes" to your life and your time
• Setting boundaries does not mean always making
  the right decision. You are simply taking
  responsibility for how you live your life.

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9. Think Ahead Prepare

• List common situations that could use a boundary.
  If one of them comes up, you will have a pattern
  of action you can use at your fingertips. You
  won't even have to think about the best way to
  handle it you'll know.
• Ask you agency owner to schedule time to discuss
  boundaries and create agency standards.

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9. Think Ahead Prepare

• How to set boundaries with an agency owner.
• Lets say an owner comes to you with a request
  and you do not have time to complete it at that
  moment
• I am currently working on re-marketing this
  account for my Producer. He needed this done as
  quickly as possible. Is it important that your
  request be completed now, or can we set a time at
  300 this afternoon to get this taken care of?

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9. Think Ahead Prepare

• Lets say that the owner does want the task done
  right away.
• I will be glad to take care of this for you. I
  will copy you on an email to the Producer that
  his project will get completed first thing
  tomorrow morning.

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9. Think Ahead Prepare

• How to request an Agency Owner to be more
  supportive of boundaries.
• First, request a time to talk with your Owner
  about boundaries. (Make sure you have his
  undivided attention)
• I have a problem that I dont know how to solve
  and I really need your help.
• I attended a webinar on boundaries in the
  workplace, and I really see the benefit of
  setting boundaries, but I am not sure how to
  begin. What do you recommend?

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10. Check All Of Lifes Boundaries

• See if you need to set boundaries with family and
  loved ones. Relationships are a wonderful part of
  life, but they can also drain your energy, time,
  and vitality.
• Boundaries in your personal life will have a
  measurable effect on your workday. Always be sure
  to take an honest look at every aspect of your
  life.

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Review of the 10 Steps For Setting Boundaries

• 1 - Make a list of people who drain your time
• 2 - List what boundaries need to be set
• 3 - Remind yourself that you have a right to set
  
• boundaries for your life
• 4 - Make A Short Affirmation To Describe Your
  New Boundaries
• 5 - Rehearse Explaining Your Boundaries To
  Others

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Review of the 10 Steps For Setting Boundaries

• 6 Look For Win-Win Situations When Setting
  Boundaries
• 7 Communicate Boundaries Without Anger
• 8 Relax
• 9 Think and Plan Ahead
• 10 Check All Of Lifes Boundaries