Recognizing%20and%20Understanding%20Feelings

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Recognizing and Understanding Feelings

• Nurturing Parenting
• Section 9.2
• GOAL
• To Teach Parents Ways to Help Children Handle
  Their Feelings.

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OBJECTIVES

• To Help Parents Identify the Feelings of the
  Children.
• To Help Parents Encourage Children to Handle
  Their Own Feelings.

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For the next hour we will focus on the very
significant area of helping children be able to
Express Their Feelings. Children who can
identify their own feelings and recognize
feelings of others are better adjusted.
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Understanding the Feelings of a Child (Hold up
Photo)

1. How is the child feeling?
2. How do you know he/she is feeling ______.
3. What do you think happened?
4. Do your child(ren) ever feel ______?
5. Why?
6. What do you do when your child feels ________ ?

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Brainstorm a list of feelings children commonly
have to deal with.
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Discuss the feelings of loss, rejection, abuse
that many children have to handle. Feeling of
Loss is one that almost all children have to deal
with! Loss as it relates to love, belonging,
security, trust, and for many, the loss of their
happy childhood.
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Lets Play Charades

• Look at your word.
• Without words, you are to try guess the feeling
  the adult is trying to project.
• Parents are to make a noise that repressents that
  feeling e.g., grunting for anger giggling for
  happy etc.
• Everyone takes a turn.

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Upset
Afraid
Irritated
Angry
Happy
Sad
Relaxed
Annoyed
Lonely
affectionate
Anxious
Jealous
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Lets Talk About Feelings

• Do you let your feelings show or do they hide
  within you?
• Do you give your children permission to express
  their feelings?
• What feelings do children generally have
  difficulty handling? Why?

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How Parents Can Help Children With Their Feelings

• Feelings are okay and feelings can always be
  accepted, but not necessarily the behavior.
  Behavior must have limits.
• Label the feeling you see or think you see. You
  look angry, or proud, or Happy. This will
  give the child a feeling of being believed and
  respected.

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How Parents Can Help Children With Their
Feelings (cont)

• Do not dominate the conversation. Let the child
  do the talking. Encourage sharing by looking
  interested in what they are saying. Children can
  think better when someone is not advising, or
  blaming, or criticizing.
• When the child wants something, honor the desire.

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How Parents Can Help Children With Their
Feelings (cont)

• If you are in the store and your child wants a
  cassette tape or video tape, rather than saying
  no, tell them you wish you could give them
  anything they want. If I had the money, I would
  buy you a dozen tapes. Or, If I could, Id buy
  you every kind of designer jeans there is a
  different pair for every day of the week.
• This can have almost a magical effect on the
  situation because you have joined the child, not
  forbidden them.

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How Parents Can Help Children With Their
Feelings (cont)

• When you show you care about the childs
  feelings, the child feels that you understand and
  appreciate their desires.
• This can be very restorative for many children.
• Once children realize that their feelings are
  honored, they are more open to listening to logic
  why they cannot have what they want.
• Children want your respect!!!

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Role Playing

• Have parents form pairs.
• One parent be the child, and the other will be
  the parent.
• Ask the child to demonstrate a feeling without
  telling the parent beforehand what the feeling
  is.
• Ask the parent to use the three steps just
  discussed to process the childs feelings.
  Afterwards, reverse roles.

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What Are the Three Steps

• Label the feeling
• Let the child describe the feeling or what he/she
  wants. Listen closing and repeat what you
  thought you heard from the child.
• When the child wants something, honor the desire.

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Share Your Experiences

• What were your impression of the role playing?
• How did the child feel when the parent
  honored the request?

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The Best solution for helping a child handle
feelings is to talk to the child about what and
how he/she feels.