Modern Man

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Modern Man

•  George Carlin is a Modern Man
• Must function as a productive
  team member.
• Family man
• Contributor to the community

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Developing Emotional Vocabulary 

• Requires more than being able to read and write.
• Developing an emotional vocabulary will help
  males express themselves and not fall into an
  emotional abyss.

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How To Help

• We need to show boys there is more than one way
  to be a guy
• There is more than one road to masculinity and it
  is not thru simple violence or sexual conquest
• Encourage emotional honesty with ones self
• Emotional honesty required language

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Without Languageto Express Thoughts, Ideas, and
Feelings, Boys Express Themselves Through
Behavior.
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Boys often have difficulty in the following types
of situations and circumstances
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When a quick response to an emotional issue is
expected, allowing little time for processing.
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Hormonal changes during adolescence impact the
brain making the boy want to move, while parents
and teachers are saying Sit Still.
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Difficulty learning to read causes some boys to
feel stupid in front of others.
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Peers or adults taunt boys about their physical
appearance or their ability to perform well.
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Teachers and other adults sometimes use sarcasm
to discipline or motivate boys.
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Boys imitate male on male violence seen in the
media as a way to solve problems.
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Parents and educators dont establish an
emotional safety zone. For example Come on,
grow up, take it like a man.
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Boys need to be fixed with a pill or some
physical punishment to control their behavior.
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Parents and Educators use their Harsh Parenting
Voice to Scold and Reprimand Boys.
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Make a Change

• Replace Competitiveness
• Increase Empathy
• Widen Negotiation
• Reach Compromise
• Boys should be allowed to be more emotional.

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Dont Suffer in Silence
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Build an Emotional Vocabulary
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Time to Process

• Emotive Data is Complex
• Longer for Boys
• Up to 5 Hours

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Emotions Take Over

• Build emotional vocabulary.
• Get in touch with feelings.
• Respect Space.
• Give Time.

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Attitude is Everything

• Non-verbal Expression
• Actions speak louder than words.
• Body language is what is remembered

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Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

• Inability to express oneself can be frustrating.
• Poor progress in school leads to low self-esteem
  and image.
• Lack of confidence in abilities.

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The Boy Code

• BIG BOYS DONT CRY

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What Happens If Boys Dont Cry?
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They can take on obsessive behaviors such as

1. Alcoholism
2. Drug Addiction
3. Workaholics
4. Sexual Promiscuity
5. Inability to Maintain Personal Relationships
6. Eating Disorders
7. Obsessive Spending of Money
8. Gambling
9. Obsessive Hobbies
10. Obsession with Movies, Sports and Television

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The Armor
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Motivations and Goals
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Addictive Behavior

• Addictive behavior can divert kids from their
  course.

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What causes emotional pain for boys?
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Lack of resources essential for survival.
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Necessary Resources

1. Financial resources
2. Emotional
3. Mental
4. Spiritual
5. Physical
6. Support Systems
7. Relationships/Role Models
8. Knowledge of the Hidden Rules

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Financial Resources
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Emotional Resources
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Mental Resources
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Physical Resources
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Support Systems
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Relationships/Role Models
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Knowledge of the Boy Code
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Missing any combination of these resources and
not having the vocabulary to articulate oneself
can be the kiss of death for some boys.
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A list of feeling words can be helpful in problem
resolution when students have difficulty
expressing themselves.
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