Teen Dating Violence

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Teen Dating Violence
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StatisticsGathered from the National Teen Dating
Violence Prevention Initiative, Breaking the
Silence, ATG , Safe Dates, Love is Respect,
Teen Dating Violence

• 1 in 5 female high school students report being
  physically and/or sexually abused by a dating
  partner. 1, 5
• Girls are more likely to threaten to hurt
  themselves, yell, pinch, slap, scratch, or kick
  1
• Boys injure girls more severely and frequently 1
• Teen dating violence runs across race, gender,
  and socioeconomic lines. 1

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Statistics continued

• Females ages 16-24 are more vulnerable to
  intimate partner violence than any other age
  group at a rate almost triple the national
  average. 1
• 69 of all teens who had sex by age 14 said they
  have gone through one or more types of abuse in a
  relationship. 3
• 81 of parents surveyed either believe teen
  dating violence is not an issue or admit they
  dont know if its an issue. 1

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Statistics continued

• 57 of teens know someone who has been
  physically, sexually, or verbally abusive in a
  dating relationship. 1
• Only 33 of teens who were in an abusive
  relationship ever told anyone about the abuse. 1
• 50 of youth reporting both dating violence and
  rape also reported attempting suicide, compared
  to 12.5 of non-abused girls and 5.4 of
  non-abused boys. 1

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Statistics continued

• Violent relationships in adolescence can have
  serous ramifications for victims. Many will
  continue to be abused in their adult
  relationships and are at a higher risk for
  substance abuse, eating disorders, risky sexual
  behavior, and suicide. 1
• Violence in relationships almost always reoccurs
  and gets more severe over time. 7
• The severity of violence among intimate partners
  has been shown to increase if the pattern has
  been established in adolescence. 1

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Statistics continued

• Between 1993 and 1999, 22 of all homicides
  against females ages 16-19 were committed by an
  intimate partner. 1
• 70 of pregnant teenagers are abused by their
  partners. 2
• Both girls and boys are victims and perpetrators
  of abuse. 7
• 58 of rape victims report being raped between
  the ages of 12-24. 1

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Types of Dating Violence

• Physical
• Sexual
• Emotional
• Verbal
• Psychological

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Physical Violence

• Pushing/ shoving
• Restraining
• Choking
• Kicking
• Hitting
• Slapping
• Punching
• Spitting
• Scratching

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Verbal Abuse

• Name calling
• Anger outbursts
• Cursing
• Blaming
• Belittling
• Critical (weight, hair, etc)

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Emotional and Psychological Abuse

• Controlling (where you go, who youre with)
• Obsessive
• Partner feels responsible for problems in
  relationship, guilt, or shame
• Extreme jealousy (even of family)
• Belittling (makes fun of talents, etc)
• Threaten harm either against partner or self
• Coerced sexual contact (fear that if they do not
  give in the partner will leave them
• Disrespectful

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Emotional/ Psychological Abuse continued.

• Harassment (Excessive and repeated texting or
  calling)
• Demanding
• Monitoring cell phone usage (text messages and
  numbers) and MySpace/Facebook accounts
• Intimidation
• Isolation (from family, peers, previous hobbies
  and interests)
• Fosters dependence (I cant live w/o youno one
  else will love you the way I do)

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Sexual Abuse

• Forced sexual contact (either with physical
  restraint, physical contact, or threat of harm)

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Cycle of AbuseThe Womens Center 4

• Excuses  after an abusive episode, the abuser
  and victim both explain away the problem.
• Honeymoon Period  things seem to be going very
  well.  When things are great they are really
  great gifts, apologies, positive feelings,
  etc.
• Routine  a return to routine life around the
  home and at work.

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Cycle of AbuseContinued

• Tension  tension begins to build and the abuser
  begins to show signs of irritability, anger,
  impatience, frustration, etc.  The victim
  recognizes these signs and begins to feel a
  familiar need to walk on eggshells Trigger 
  something sets off the abuser, often not easily
  identified or based in reality.
• The victims self-esteem and confidence drops,
  and the pattern repeats itself.

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Why do teens stay in abusive relationships?
Resource from Choose Respect 8

• Love
• Confusion
• Belief you can CHANGE the partner
• Promises
• Denial
• Shame or guilt
• Fear of retaliation

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Continued

• False hopes
• Peer or family pressure
• Fear of being outed
• Lack of resources.
• Fear of being alone
• Loss of independence
• Low self-esteem

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Consequences of Teen Dating Violence

• Isolation from friends and family
• Alienation from former groups
• Disinterest in school/ dropping out
• Suicide attempts or ideation 6
• Feelings of hopelessness
• Drug or alcohol abuse 6
• Risky sexual behavior 6 (pregnancy or STDs)
• Physical injury
• Decreased self-esteem
• At-risk for future violent relationships

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Warning Signs

• Decrease in grades or interest in school
• Gradual loss of core friends
• Isolates self from the family
• Gives excuses for partners behavior
• Avoids normal social functions or hobbies
• Partner always present
• Constant checking in with the partner
• Change in appearance (less makeup, dressing down,
  etc)
• Suspicious injuries (bruises, scratches, etc)
• Always needing to attend to partners phone calls
  or text messages
• Nervous when around partner
• Always trying to make the partner happy

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What is a parent to do?

• If possible, personally model healthy
  relationships
• Expose your child to other healthy relationships
• Set reasonable limits regarding cell phone
  usage, face to face time with partner, etc)
• Try to ask questions about their relationships
  with genuine concernnot nosiness
• Stay calm
• If necessary, help teen discuss a safety plan on
  how to end the relationship

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Continued

• Discuss the future with your teen
• Discuss their expectations of a partner
• Keep communication with you and your teen as open
  as possible
• Ask other adult mentors to get involved with your
  teen
• Support and encourage teens involvement with
  other healthy interests
• Refer to counseling when necessary
• May need to contact the partners parent
• Their may be a need to involve the authorities or
  school personnel.

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BOTTOM LINEDatingshould be FUN!
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Sources Resources

• 1. National Teen Dating Violence Prevention
  Initiative www.clotheslineproject.org/teendatingv
  iolencefacts.pdf
• 2. Talk About Dating Violence
• www.atg.wa.gov/ProtectingYouth/TeenDatingViolence/
  BreakingTheSilence.aspx
• 3.Teen Dating Violence
• www.atg.wa.gov/protectingyouth/teendatingviolence.
  aspx
• Lets Talk
• www.thewomenscenter.org
• Love is Respect
• www.loveisrespect.org
• The Impact of Dating Violence/ Choose Respect
• www.cdc.gov
• Safe Dates
• www.hazelden.org