The 6 1 Traits of Writing

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The 61 Traits of Writing

• Mr. Budden
• Indiana Teachers of Writing
• IUPUI

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We must change from a model that picks winners
to one that will create winners. ?Harold
Hodgkinson Michigan The State and Its
Educational System
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The 61 Traits of Writing
Ideas the meaning and development of the
message Organization the internal structure of
the piece Voice the tone of the piecethe
personal stamp that the writer brings to it Word
Choice the specific vocabulary the writer uses
to convey meaning Sentence Fluency the way
the words and phrases flow throughout the
text Conventions the mechanical correctness of
the piece Presentation the overall appearance
of the work
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VOICE

• Recognizing strong voice
• Employing the power of YOUR voicehow?

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(60)
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• A writer should like the subject of the writing
• A writer should speak right to the reader
• A reader should feel what the writer feels
• A reader can indentify real person behind the
  writing
• The tone (humorous, dramatic, et.) of the writing
  should match the subject
• Good writing seems unique to the writer

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• Yes, I had beautiful long hair after my older
  sister had pinned the fall to the top of my head
  in her bedroom, which was painted the color of
  the best sky. She was proud that I finally took
  an interest in my hair, and there was only one
  thing I could think to do to keep from bursting.
  I decided to go play rodeo on my bicycle with the
  purple banana seat and the sissy bars. It was my
  stallion, and we had been down a dusty road or
  two.

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• As I climbed on and started speeding down the
  street, I could feel my sisters newfound respect
  fading like an old star, but I couldnt stop. I
  turned the corner of Charles and Jefferson as if
  nothing could touch meI rode faster an dfaster.
  As I went past the Kizers house, where all the
  mangy foster children lived, one of them shouted,
  Nice wig! and I yelled back, my face bent close
  to the handle bars, Its my real hair! and it
  was a long time before I went back home.

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• and so there aint nothing more to write about,
  and I am rotten glad of it, because if Id
  aknowed what a trouble it was to make book, I
  wouldnt atackled it, and aint going to no
  more.

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• Exclamation points are the most irritating of
  all. Look! they say, look at what I just said!
  How amazing is my thought! It is like being
  forced to watch someone elses small child
  jumping up and down crazily in the center of the
  living room shouting to attract attention.

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Wolf

• The Gray Wolf (Canis lupus also spelled Grey
  Wolf, see spelling differences also known as
  Timber Wolf or Wolf) is a mammal in the order
  Carnivora. The Gray Wolf shares a common ancestry
  with the domestic dog (Canis lupus familiaris),
  as evidenced by DNA sequencing and genetic drift
  studies. Gray wolves were once abundant and
  distributed over much of North America, Eurasia,
  and the Middle East. Today, for a variety of
  human-related reasons, including widespread
  habitat destruction and excessive hunting, wolves
  inhabit only a very limited portion of their
  former range. (fr. Wikipedia)

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• versus

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Wolves (in Zoobooks 2)
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• Wolves are the lions of the Northern Hemisphere.
  Found in North America, Europe and Asia, the
  lives of wolves are very similar to the lives of
  lions in Africa. Like lions, wolves live in
  groups, they are meat-eating animals that work
  together to catch prey, and they are beautiful
  animals. In fact, some of them even have thick
  ruffs of hair that look like the manes of lions.
  When you consider all these similarities, it
  seems strange that many people admire lions, but
  dislike wolves. Lions are called magnificent
  and lordly. But wolves are often called
  sneaky and cowardly.

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The Redwoods

• Last year, we went on a vacation and we had a
  wonderful time. The weather was sunny and warm
  and there was lots to do, so we were never bored.
• My parents visited friends and took pictures
  for their friends back home. My brother and I
  swam and also hiked in the woods. When we got
  tired of that, we just ate and had a wonderful
  time.
• It was exciting and fun to be together as a
  family and to do things together. I love my
  family and this is a time that I will remember
  for a long time. I hope we will go back again
  next year for more fun and an even better time
  than we had this year.

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• MOUSE ALERT
• As soon as school was out we left on vacation.
  Nothing went the was it was supposed to. Dad
  backed into a tree on the way out of the
  driveway, pushing the bike rack through the rear
  window and nearly scaring my sister to death.
  She was cranky the rest of the trip. We had to
  take our other car, which is smaller and you
  can't hook the bike rack up to it. Now my sister
  and me were crowded together so much she kept
  complaining about me breathing on her and taking
  up all her air and foot room. Plus now Dad knew a
  big bill would be waiting for him when we got
  home. It put everyone in a lovely trip starting
  mood.

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• We were supposed to go to Yellowstone Park.
  Well, actually, we did, but just barely. I think
  we hold the world's record for shortest time
  spent in the park. This was all due to my
  mother's new attitude toward animals. The night
  before yellowstone we stayed in a cabin on the
  edge of the park. It had a lot of mice but most
  of them had the good sense to stay hidden in the
  walls. One poor furry guy had a death wish and
  showed himself. The whole family went into
  action. My father got a broom, which looked like
  an oversized weapen for a mouse. My mother hugged
  her pink flanel night gown around her knees,
  jumped up on a wood chair and started shreiking
  "Kill him! Kill him!"

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• Her eyes were as big as her fists. I had never
  seen her quite so blood thirsty. My sister spent
  the whole time dancing on the bed crying her eyes
  out and yelling "Don't kill it Dad! Don't kill
  it!" It was up to Dad and me to trap it. We got
  it in a pickle jar and took it down to the lake
  and let it go. It seemed really happy to get away
  from us. I thought I knew how it felt.

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• The next day we raced through Yellowstone and
  then headed home. My Mother said she had enough
  of animals. For weeks afterwards, this was the
  big story she told everyone who asked about our
  vacation. You'd have thought the whole point of
  our trip was to go on a mouse hunt. Dad said all
  the money we saved by not staying at Yellowstone
  could go to pay for the broken car window, so for
  him the trip worked out perfect. As for me, I'm
  still planing to get back to Yellowstone one day.
  I want to see something bigger than a mouse.

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The Scoring Guide

• Individual bullets support accurate and reliable
  assessment
• The bullets are the basis of the written and or
  verbal comments by the teacher or peers.
• Each bullet can be a focus lesson for instruction
  in writing workshop.

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Key Qualities of the Voice Trait

• The writer takes risks and experiments with style
  to match the purpose and audience
• The writer and the reader have a powerful
  connection and reveals the person behind the
  words
• The writing creates a reaction in the reader by
  speaking directly to the reader on an emotional
  level
• The writer is excited about the topic.

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PEER RESPONSE. Activity Rules

• No JUDGMENTS ALLOWED. Focus on CONTENT only, not
  the writing.
• ASK Interpretive Questions ONLY, which
• cannot be answered with a Yes or No
• begin with WHO, WHAT, WHERE, WHEN, WHY, and HOW
• dont begin with IS, ARE, WAS, WERE, CAN, WILL

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The 61 Traits of Writing Are NOT

• About worksheets or out-of-context practice
  They are about thinking

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The 61 Traits of Writing ARE

• A common language to talk about writing This is
  a new thing for many teachers
• A shared vision of what good looks like in all
  forms of writing Setting clear targets for
  success
• An assessment tool for teachers and students
  The strength of the model
• A model for use in a writing process classroom
  Traits are what we do when we revise and edit

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61 Traits and the Writing Process

• Prewrite Discover what you want to say (Ideas,
  Organization, Voice) (mode and genre)
• Draft Get it down (Sentence Fluency)
• Share/Feedback Find out what worked and what
  need work (for one or more traits or the piece as
  a whole)
• Revise Rework the text to make it clear (Ideas,
  Organization, Voice, Word Choice, Sentence
  Fluency)
• Edit Make the text readable (Conventions
  spelling, capitalization, punctuation, grammar,
  and paragraphing)
• Finish Polish the final appearance
  (Presentation)

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What Is Revision?

• Revise to change the text to make it clear
• ideas
• organization
• voice
• word choice
• sentence fluency

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What is editing?

• Editing to edit the text for conventions of
  Standard English
• spelling
• punctuation
• capitalization
• grammar
• paragraphing
• Presentation The appearance and neatness of the
  work
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VOICE is learned through any activity that allows
you to

• feel safe and accepted as a writer
• see moments of voice in writing and pictures
• value and request diversity
• see risk as rewardedeven over success
• hear the voices of others
• write to someone
• write voice inor out.

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• What verbs are missing from the following passage
  from Annie Dillards essay In the Jungle in her
  book Teaching a Stone to Talk Expeditions and
  Encounters?

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• The lake was wonderful. Herons, egrets and
  ibises _____the sawgrass shores, kingfishers and
  cuckoos _____ from sunlight to shade, great
  turkeylike birds ____ in dead branches, and hawks
  ____ overhead. There was all the time in the
  world.
• I saw the shoreline water ___ and the sawgrass
  ___above a thrashing paichi, an enormous black
  fish in these partsPiranha fish live in the
  lakes, and electric eels. I ____ my fingers in
  the water, figuring it would be worth it

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• The lake was wonderful. Herons, egrets and
  ibises plodded the sawgrass shores, kingfishers
  and cuckoos clattered from sunlight to shade,
  great turkeylike birds fussed in dead branches,
  and hawks lolled overhead. There was all the
  time in the world. I saw the shoreline water roil
  and the sawgrass heave above a thrashing paichi,
  an enormous black fish in these partsPiranha
  fish live in the lakes, and electric eels. I
  dangled my fingers in the water, figuring it
  would be worth it

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Valiant Tries in Voice Metaphors and Similes

• Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that
  had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh
  Master.
• She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that
  sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
• From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole
  scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when
  you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy
  comes on at 700 p.m. instead of 730.
• Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair
  after a sneeze.
• John and Mary had never met. They were like two
  hummingbirds who had also never met.

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• He fell for her like his heart was a mob
  informant and she was the East River.
• The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you
  get from not eating for a while.
• The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and
  extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog
  at a fire hydrant.
• He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought
  he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck
  backing up.
• The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil.
  But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.