Relationships: Friends, Spouses, Family

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13 Inter-Act, 13th Edition

Intimate Relationships
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Intimacy

• A pattern of self-disclosure and supportive
  messages between partners
• May have many friends, but only a handful of
  intimate relationships
• Intimacy resides in the inter-action between
  partners.

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Intimate Conversations

• Emotional disclosures reveal sensitive, private,
  and personally risky information, signaling a
  desire for intimacy
• Mutual understanding comprehending your own and
  your partners point of view
• Warm feelings positive feelings you have about
  yourself and your partner during and immediately
  after an interaction
• Verbal and nonverbal messages signal closeness.

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Intimate Relationship
Relationship in which partners share regular
intimate interactions, feel affection for each
other, trust each other, and are cohesive
Mutual Affection
Cohesiveness
Trust
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Family
A network of people who share their lives over
long periods of time bound by ties of marriage,
blood, or commitment, legal or otherwise, who
consider themselves a family, and who share a
significant history and anticipated future of
functioning in a family relationship (Galvin,
Bylund, Brommel, 2003)
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Common Family Structures
Traditional 2 opposite-sex parents Married Children Single-Parent 1 parent lives with children 1 parent not present, may or may not be actively parenting Shared-Custody Divorced parents Children switch residences Blended 2 adults 1 or more children from previous relationships
Common-Law 2 opposite-sex parents Unmarried Children Gay and Lesbian 2 same-sex partners Children Extended Multiple generations of related people living together Communal Cooperative living arrangement among unmarried people
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ParentChild Communication

• Nurturing parental communication parental
  messages that encourage a childs physical,
  social, emotional, and intellectual development
• Controlling parental communication parental
  messages that attempt to influence or regulate a
  childs behavior
• Good parenting requires a balance of nurturing
  and controlling messages.

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Infant Attachment Styles
Secure Worthy of care Others are trusted to provide care Anxious-Ambivalent Not worthy of care Others cannot be trusted to provide care Avoidant Worthy of care Others not trusted to provide care
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Adult Attachment Styles
Secure High self-worth Trusts others Preoccupied High self-worth Low trust in others Fearful Low self-worth High trust in others Dismissive Low self-worth Low trust in others
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Providing Discipline

• Permissive parenting style moderate to high
  levels of nurturing but little control over
  childrens behavior
• Authoritarian parenting style high levels of
  control with low levels of nurturing
• Authoritative parenting style firm control
  balanced with ample nurturing

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Improving Family Communication

• Create opportunities for intimate communication.
• Respect individual interests and accomplishments.
• Recognize and adapt to change.

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Friendships

• Voluntary, platonic relationships characterized
  by equality and reciprocity
• Likely to form between people who have frequent
  contact and similar demographic traits and engage
  in the same activities

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MaleMale Relationships
FemaleFemale Relationships

• Relationships are based on shared activities.
• Talk about topics rather than feelings
• Use covert intimacy to show closeness
• Mild insults
• Competition
• Put-downs

• Conversations focus on topics as well as
  relationships.
• Intimacy is based on mutual self-disclosure of
  feelings, secrets, and insights.

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Intimate Relationships
Platonic Relationship Partners are not sexually
attracted to each other or choose not to act on
their attraction
Romantic Relationship Partners do act on
their sexual attraction to each other
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Types of Long-Term Committed Relationships

• Traditional share a traditional ideology but
  maintain some independence, engage in conflict
• Independent share an ideology that embraces
  change and uncertainty, but are interdependent
  and engage in conflict
• Separate share traditional ideology, but are
  independent and avoid conflict

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Characteristics of Intimate Relationships

• Mutual respect treating each other with dignity
• Presence of a shared plan or life vision
  agreeing on long-term goals
• Comfortable level of closeness spending a
  mutually satisfying amount of time with each other

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Keys to Successful Long-Term Relationships

• Show your affection.
• Use symbols and rituals to display your
  commitment.
• Talk about sex.

Microsoft Photo
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The Dark Side of Intimacy

• Relational uncertainty feeling of doubt about
  the nature of the relationship
• Unsure if relationship is platonic or romantic
• Concern about future
• Tension between closeness and separation
• Possessiveness desire to control another person
  to ensure exclusivity
• Caused by jealousy
• Can occur in platonic and family relationships as
  well as romantic ones

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Digital Communication Skills

• Media multiplexity using more than one form of
  social media to communicate in relationships
• Strong social media ties friends, romantic
  partners, and family members
• Weak social media ties casual contacts loosely
  connected to social networks

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Initiating Relationships Online

• Social Information Processing (SIP) theory
  explains how relationships evolve online.
• Revealing and seeking personal information
  reduces uncertainty.
• Online relationships require more time to
  develop.
• Digital interaction can be intense and overly
  intimate (hyperpersonal).