The Holy Grail for Success

1
The Holy Grail for Success Happiness

• Gary R. Bertoline
• Professor Computer Graphics Technology
• Assistant Dean of Graduate Studies
• Director of the Envision Center for Data
  Perceptualization

2
Introduction

• This lecture is the result of years of study on
  the prerequisites for success and happiness.
• I also have many life experiences that have
  contributed to my knowledge.
• Ultimately you must reframe work and education
  so that you view them as a privilege rather than
  a duty.

3
Finding Your Calling

• Only 50 of employees say that they are satisfied
  with their work.
• People experience work in one of 3 ways
• As a Job- perceived as a unpleasant task
• As a Career- motivated by extrinsic factors
• As a Calling- motivated by intrinsic factors,
  displays passion, derives personal fulfillment,
  and perceives it as a privilege.

4
Successful People

• Stanley Marcus the legendary retailer and past
  chairman of Neiman-Marcus was once asked What do
  the wealthy, powerful, and famous people you know
  have in common?
• He replied We all have 24 hour days. The world
  has expanded in almost all directions, but we
  still have a 24 hour day. Most successful people
  and the most unsuccessful people all receive the
  same ration of hours each day. The difference
  between being successful and not being successful
  depends on how you use your daily ration of 24
  hours.

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tick tock tick tock tick tock tick

• The way you think about time and think about
  yourself will affect everything that happens to
  you the rest of your life.
• Time is money. Calculate how much your time is
  worth by dividing your annual salary by 2 and
  move the decimal place 3 spots to the left to
  determine your approximate hourly wage.
• However, happiness is the ultimate currency and
  the only currency that really matters. More on
  this point later

6
Living in the Zone

• What if you could dedicate 100 of your attention
  to whatever was at hand, at your own choosing,
  with no distractions?
• There is a way to get a grip on it all, stay
  relaxed, and get meaningful things done with
  minimal effort at work and in life.
• You can experience what top athletes refer to as
  the zone within your complete world.

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Managing Commitments

• If its on your mind, your mind is not clear.
• You must clarify exactly what your commitment is
  and decide what you have to do to make progress
  toward fulfilling it (outcome).
• Once you decide on the actions, you must keep
  reminders of them organized in a system you
  review regularly.
• Outcome thinking is one of the most effective
  means available for making wishes a reality.

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Why Things are on Your Mind

• You want it different than it currently is
• You have not clarified the intended outcome
• You have not decided what the very next physical
  action step is
• You have not put reminders on the outcomes and
  the action required in a system you trust

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The Transformation of Stuff

• Stuff is anything that you have allowed into your
  psychological or physical world that does not
  belong where it is, but for which you have not
  yet determined the desired outcome and the next
  action steps.
• The reason most organizing systems have not
  worked is the stuff has not been transformed.
• As long as it remains stuff, it is not
  controllable

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The Process Managing Action

• You need to get in the habit of keeping nothing
  on your mind.
• This cannot be done by managing time, managing
  information, or managing priorities
• You cannot manage 5 minutes and end up with 6
• You do not manage information overload otherwise
  every time you walked into a library or connect
  to the web you would blow up
• You do not manage priorities you have them
• The key is to manage your stuff by managing your
  actions

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Managing Actions

• The real issue is how you manage actions
• What you do with your time
• What you do with information
• What you do with your body and your focus
  relative to your priorities
• These are your real options to which you allocate
  your limited resources.
• The real issue is not a lack of time but a lack
  of clarity and definition about what a project
  really is and what are the associated next steps

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Getting it Our of Your Head

• Capture and organize 100 of your stuff in some
  systematic manner.
• That applies to everything little or big,
  personal or professional, urgent or not urgent.
• Everything!

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Practice Exercise

• Write down the project or situation that is most
  on your mind at this moment.
• Now describe in a single written sentence your
  intended successful outcome for this project or
  situation.
• Now write down the very next physical action
  required to move the project or situation forward.

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Practice Exercise Results

• You should feel a tiny bit of enhanced control,
  relaxation, and focus.
• You may also feel more motivated to actually do
  something
• Now imagine this magnified 1000 times as you
  begin to organize your stuff.
• What you experienced is the act of thinking.
• You have to think about your stuff more than you
  realize but less than you may be afraid it might.
• Think like a man of action, act like a man of
  thought Henry Bergson

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The Power of Full Engagement

• Managing energy not time is the key to high
  performance
• You must become a Corporate Athlete
• Full engagement required drawing on four separate
  but related sources of energy physical,
  emotional, mental and spiritual.

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Henry David Thoreau

• I know of no more encouraging fact than the
  unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life
  by conscious endeavor.

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Habit 1 Be Proactive

• Proactive- as human beings we are responsible for
  our own lives.
• Our behavior is a function of our decisions, not
  our conditions.
• Taking initiative.
• Proactive focus widens our circle of influence.
• Reactive focus reduces our circle of influence.
• Habits- it takes about 21 days of practice and
  repetition to form a new habit pattern.

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Habit 1- Be Proactive

• Proactive means more than taking initiative.
• We are responsible for our own lives.
• Our behavior is a function of our decisions, not
  our conditions.
• Behavior based on values and not feelings.
• Reactive people are driven by feelings.
• Between stimulus and response, humans have the
  freedom to choose.
• It is not what happens to us but our response to
  what happened.

• Eleanor Roosevelt- No one can hurt you without
  your consent.

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Practice, practice, practice

• The one reason that my group Run-DMC was on
  point was practice. If I miss a day of practice,
  I know it. If I miss two days, my manager knows
  it. If I miss three days, my audience knows it.
  Practice, practice, practice.
• Rev Run

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Direct, Indirect, and No Control

• Direct control- problems involving our own
  behavior.
• Solved by working on our habits.
• Indirect control- problems involving other
  peoples behavior.
• Solved by changing our methods of influence,
  Habits 4 think win-win, 5- seek first to
  understand, 6- synergize.
• No control- problems we can do nothing about.
• Accept problems and learn to live with them.

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Integrity in the Moment of Choice

• May be convenient to live with the illusion that
  circumstances or other people are responsible for
  the quality of our lives.
• The reality is that we are responsible
  response-able for our choices.

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Oliver Wendell Holmes

• What lies behind us and what lies before us are
  tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

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Begin with the end in mind- Habit 2

• All things are created twice a mental or first
  creation and a physical or second creation.
• Must start with a clear understanding of your
  destination.

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Practice Exercise

• Write a Mission statements- your constitution.
• Mission statements should be simple, short, and
  to the point.
• Mission statements are lived not read.
• Your mission statement becomes your constitution,
  the solid expression of your vision and values.
• Begin the process by asking these 3 questions
• What gives you meaning?- sense of purpose
• What gives you pleasure?- enjoyable activities
• What are my strengths?- natural talents

I highly recommend reading the books First Break
All the Rules then read Now, Discovery Your
Strengths
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Meaning of Life

• Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning
  of life is, but rather must recognize that it is
  he who is asked. In a word, each man is
  questioned by life and he can only answer to
  life by answering for his own life to life he
  can only respond to being responsible.
• Viktor Frankel- Nazi death camp survivor and
  author

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A Mission Statement

• Mother Teresa was a great woman who dedicated her
  life to the poor people of the world. She had a
  personal mission statement that is simple and
  elegant.
• Her mission as stated when she accepted the Nobel
  Peace prize
• "to care for the hungry, the naked, the homeless,
  the crippled, the blind, the lepers, all those
  people who feel unwanted, unloved, uncared for
  throughout society, people that have become a
  burden to the society and are shunned by
  everyone."

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The Passion of Vision

• Individual, teams, and organizations with a
  strong sense of mission significantly outperform
  those without the strength of vision.
• Vision is the primary motivation of human action.
• Sometimes called passion because it is such a
  powerful motivating force.
• Review your mission or vision weekly.
• The most pathetic person in the world is someone
  who has sight but no vision. Helen Keller

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Put First Things First- Habit 3

• Effective management is putting first things
  first.
• Organize and execute around priorities.
• The successful person has the habit of doing the
  things failures dont like to do.
• Time management- the challenge is not to manage
  time but to manage yourself.

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Time Management

• Time is inelastic- it cannot be stretched
• Time is indispensable- all work and
  accomplishments require it
• Time is irreplaceable- there is no substitute for
  it
• Time is perishable- it cannot be saved,
  preserved, or stored. Once it is gone, it is
  gone forever.

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Time Management Matrix

• We spend time in one of four ways.
• Urgent- requires immediate attention
• Not urgent- can be thoughtfully scheduled and
  planned
• Important- has to do with results, it contributes
  to your mission, values, and high priority goals.
• Not important- distracters to getting important
  things done
• Not practicing Habit 2 we only respond to the
  urgent.

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Urgent/Important Quadrant 1

• Activities
• Crises
• Pressing Problems
• Deadline-driven projects
• Results
• Burnout
• Stress
• Crisis management (Farming example)
• Always putting out fires

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Not Urgent/Important Quadrant 2

• Activities
• Prevention
• Relationship building
• Recognizing new opportunities
• Planning, recreation
• Results
• Vision, perspective
• Balance
• Discipline
• Control
• Few crises

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Urgent/Not Important Quadrant 3

• Activities
• Interruptions disrupt your day
• Unplanned activities
• Popular activities
• Proximate, pressing matters
• Results
• Short term focus
• Crisis management
• Reputation- chameleon
• See goals and plans as worthless
• Feels victimized, out of control
• Shallow or broken relationships

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Not Urgent/Not Important Quadrant 4

• Activities
• Trivia, busy work
• Pleasant activities
• Procrastinate
• Results
• Total irresponsibility
• Fired from jobs
• Dependent on others or institutions for basic
  needs

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Moving into Quadrant 2

• Effective people are not problem-minded, they are
  opportunity minded. They think preventively.
• The key is not to prioritize what is on your
  schedule but to schedule your priorities. Do
  this in the context of a week.
• Quadrant 2 involves 4 key activities
• Identifying roles- write down your key roles
• Selecting goals- set 2 or 3 important results for
  the coming week.
• Scheduling- look at the week ahead and schedule
  time to achieve your goals.
• Daily adapting- prioritizing and responding to
  unanticipated events.

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Quadrant 2 Organizing

• Long term
• Write your Mission statement
• Identify your Roles
• Create Goals
• Weekly
• Review Mission Statement
• Review your Roles
• Review or Create New Goals
• Plans- Schedule Actions on a calendar

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Quadrant 2 Organizing

• Organize your activities on a weekly basis.
• Step 1 Connect with your inner vision
• What is most important?
• What gives meaning to your life?
• What do you want to be and to do in your life?
• Psychologists have found that the activities that
  give you the greatest feeling of self esteem are
  usually the activities that you are ideally
  suited to do as a lifes work
• Step 2 Write a personal mission statement

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Quadrant 2 Organizing

• Step 2 Identify your Roles
• Roles represent responsibilities, relationships,
  and areas of contribution.
• No more than 7 roles.
• A separate role called Sharpen the Saw. More on
  this later.

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Setting Goals

• Fewer than 3 of people have clear, written
  goals, and they are usually the most successful
  in every field.
• Less than 1 of people rewrite and review their
  goals on a regular basis.
• If you do not have goals for yourself, you are
  doomed forever to work for someone who does!

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Happiness as a Goal

• Happiness is the highest on the hierarchy of
  goals, the end towards which all other ends lead.
• There is much research that suggests that
  happiness is also a means toward higher levels of
  overall success.
• Numerous studies show that happy individuals are
  successful across many life domains including
  marriage, friendship, income, work performance,
  and health.
• Goals are indispensable for leading a happy life!

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Happiness Defined

• Happiness is the overall experience of pleasure
  and meaning.
• A happy person enjoys positive emotions while
  perceiving ones life as purposeful.
• A happy person experiences highs and lows but
  their overall state is positive.

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Happiness and Goals

• Having and reaching goals does not guarantee
  success or happiness.
• To experience a sense of purpose, the goals we
  set need to be intrinsically meaningful.
• You must have a self-generated purpose that has
  personal significance.
• You must choose your purpose in accordance with
  your own values and passions.
• When we do feel a sense of purpose we often feel
  like we have found our calling in life.

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Goals and Success

• People who set goals are more likely to succeed
  than people who do not.
• Set explicit objectives that are
• Challenging and specific
• With clear timelines and performance criteria
• This will lead to better performance
• Setting a goal is making a commitment with words
  and words have the power to create a better
  future.
• Making goals public also creates a measure of
  personal accountability

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Quadrant 2 Organizing

• Step 3 Select Quadrant 2 Goals in Each Role
• What is the most important thing I could do in
  each role this week to have the greatest impact?
• Limit yourself to one or two most important
  goals.
• Focus on importance rather than urgency.

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Practice Exercise

• Write at least 2 of your roles in life on your
  worksheet.
• Now write at least one goal for each role.
• Now schedule an action step for each goal on your
  worksheet calendar.

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Apply the Pareto Principle

• Pareto Principle created by the Italian economist
  Vilfredo Pareto in 1895.
• He concluded after years of study that society
  could be divided into 2 groups of people.
• The first group, 20 of the population, he called
  the vital few. This group included the people
  and families who controlled 80 of the wealth of
  Italy. The other 80 he called the trivial many,
  those who controlled 20 of the wealth.
• Further study revealed that the 80/20 rule
  applied to virtually all economic activity.
• According to this principle, 20 of what you do
  will account for 80 of the value of all things
  you do.
• Your task is to determine the top 20 of goals
  before you begin.

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Quadrant 2 Organizing

• Step 4 Create a Decision Making Framework for
  the Week
• The key is not to prioritize your schedule, but
  to schedule your priorities.
• More is better is not what you want
• What does it matter how much we do if what we are
  doing is not what matters most.
• Schedule your Quadrant 2 goals first.
• Set a specific time (most effective) or
• List it as a priority for the day
• Quadrant 3 is a good place to steal time
• Do not fill every moment of every day, allow
  flexibility

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Quadrant 2 Organizing

• Step 5 Exercise Integrity in the Moment
• Preview the day
• Prioritize your actions
• Always highlight your most important priority for
  each day.
• Step 6 Evaluate
• Before scheduling new week review the previous
  week.

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The Perspective of the Week

• Schedule open times to accommodate the
  unexpected.
• Schedule times for preparation to focus on high
  priority activities.
• Designate a specific time each week to do your
  organizing.
• Set aside a day a week for renewal.
• Have weekly organization meetings with people you
  live and work with.

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Sharpen the Saw- Habit 7

• Physical- Exercise, nutrition, stress management.
  (Assume you had a heart attack)
• Mental- Reading, visualizing, planning, writing.
  (Assume your knowledge has a half-life of 2-1/2
  years)
• Spiritual- value clarification and commitment,
  study and meditation. (Have a bigger reason to do
  something)
• Social/Emotional- Service, empathy, synergy,
  intrinsic security. (Assume everything you say
  can be overheard and everything you do can be
  seen)

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Spiritual

• Our motivation in life is largely a spiritual
  issue.
• It is our most powerful source of our motivation,
  perseverance and direction.
• It is the connection to a deeply held set of
  values and to a purpose beyond our self interest.
• The key principle that fuels our spiritual energy
  is character the courage and conviction to live
  by our values.
• Related values include passion, commitment,
  integrity, and honesty.
• You know you have a spiritual base to your life
  when you awake every morning knowing what you are
  going to do that day and why you are going to do
  it.

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Roadmap to Success

• Genetics does not guarantee success.
• Genetics play at best a very minor role in
  differentiating between those that are great in
  their field and those who are merely good.
• IQ accounts for only about 20 of factors that
  determine success
• 80 comes from other factors including Emotional
  Intelligence

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The Holy Grail to Success- Step 1

• The number one factor is the amount of time one
  spends on deliberate practice.
• Those that achieved excellence spent from 30
  minutes to 2 hours more every day on deliberate
  practice.
• It takes 10 years to reach the pinnacle of
  success.
• Simply put, 10 years of deliberate practice and
  hard work is the only sure recipe for success.
• You will become a scholar in your profession a
  learned person who by long study has gained
  mastery in one or more disciplines.

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The Holy Grail to Success- Step 2

• Having a mission statement that defines your
  roles and goals for your personal and
  professional life.

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The Holy Grail to Success- Step 3

• Manage yourself within the context of a 24-hour
  day by scheduling action steps for each of your
  roles and goals.
• A goal without a plan is just a wish Antoine
  de Saint-Exupéry

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The Holy Grail to Success- Step 4

• A relentless pursuit for happiness in your life.

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What does it mean to be Successful?

• Success is how you define it and it should be
  linked to your level of happiness.
• Success/happiness is not an external measure but
  an internal one.
• You define what it means for you to be
  successful/happy in your professional and
  personal life.
• You are ultimately responsible for your level of
  success and happiness.
• You now have all the tools necessary to define
  and execute on the level of your success and
  happiness.

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Public Victory

• Understanding the Individual
• Attending to little things
• Keeping commitments
• Clarifying expectations
• Showing personal integrity
• Apologizing sincerely

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First Things First- Always remember that

• The Main Thing is to Keep the Main Thing the Main
  Thing

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Recommended Reading

• 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Steven Covey
• The Power of Full Engagement, Jim Loehr and Tony
  Schwartz
• The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader, John
  C. Maxwell
• Time Power, Brian Tracy
• Getting Things Done, David Allen
• Happier Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and
  Lasting Fulfillment, Tal Ben-Shahar
• First Break all the Rules, Marcus Buckingham
• Now, Discovery Your Strengths, Marcus Buckingham
  and Donald Clifton
• You the Owners Manual, Michael Roizen and Mehmet
  Oz

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Recommended Reading- Investing

• Smart Couples Finish Rich, David Bach
• The Total Money Makeover, Dave Ramsey
• The Only Investment Guide Youll Ever Need,
  Andrew Tobias
• Rule 1, Phil Town