FCS 2800 Family Relations

1
FCS 2800 Family Relations

• Chapter 10
• Conflict and Conflict Resolution

2
Overview of Conflict and Anger

• The hierarchy of conflict - occurring along a
  hierarchy from decision making to problem solving
  to crisis resolution
• Anger and conflict taboos - recognize anger and
  deal with it in a positive manner

3
Myths, theories, and facts about anger

• 1. Anger is caused by others
• 2. The best way to deal with anger is to let it
  all hang out
• 3. Anger is a beneficial emotion
• 4. Youre a wimp if you hold back your anger

4
The Dance

• 1. Pursuer
• 2. Distancer
• Pursuers and distancers have difficulty finding a
  balance between separateness and togetherness

5
Intimacy and Conflict

• Intimacy breeds conflict - are inextricably
  linked
• Love and anger in balance - balancing
  separateness and togetherness (Circumplex Model)
• The dance of anger - people manage stress and
  anger in a number of different ways

6
Cont.

• Women pursuers and underfunctioners
  Men distancers and
  overfunctioners
• Sources of conflict in couples - Top 5 issues
  money, family issues, communication styles,
  household tasks, and personal tastes

7
Approaches to Conflict Resolution

• 3 top styles of resolution - newly weds discuss
  calmly 59, suffer silently 41, screaming 47
• Fighting fair John F. Crosby has developed a
  list of 16 rules for fair fighting

8
Cont.

• Constructive approaches and destructive
  approaches
• Styles of conflict resolution - competitive,
  collaborative, compromising, avoid conflict
  altogether, accommodating

9
Cont.

• Resolving conflict 6 basic steps
  1.Clarify the issue
  2.Find out person wants
  3.Identify alternatives, brainstorming
  4.Decide how to negotiate 5.Solidify the
  agreements 6.Review and
  renegotiate agreement