How to deal with anger by Lama Surya Das

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How to deal with anger by Lama Surya Das

• Anger is an unpredictable thing. Everyone feels
  anger. However, as you know, anger is not always
  a unlikely emotion to have. Anger sometimes makes
  you less appealing as a person it affects your
  work, your private life and your sense of
  well-being. This is particularly true when you
  feel constantly on the edge of having an
  emotional breakdown.
• There are three basic causes of human suffering,
  according to Buddhist teachings ignorance,
  desire and anger. Of these, it would seem, anger
  is perhaps the most-readily identifiable as well
  as potentially the most damaging to one's self,
  to others and to the environment.

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Lama Surya Das writes in "Awakening the Buddha
Within," his bestselling book on Buddhist
practice. "Anger is a human emotion and it
doesn't automatically disappear. Also it has its
own logic, its own intelligence and function. If
you bottle up and swallow your anger too often,
you are going to make yourself ill."   "Meeting
the challenge of ill will is not about denying,
repressing, or suppressing anger. It's about
staying up to date with anger and other emotions
by experiencing and releasing their energy moment
by moment rather than storing them up. It's about
not carrying grudges, or blaming yourself, or
turning your anger inward and becoming depressed
and despondent. Ideally we should be able to be
sensitive enough and aware enough not only to
feel life fully but also to let it go."
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Here is a simple practice that you can implement
to help you rein in your anger demons. Hopefully,
this helps you obtain the control you need to be
less stressed and avoid a rage filled day-to-day
lifestyle. A few steps from Lama Surya Das to
contain anger   1. Breathe deeply while
breathing out, with the exhalation. In this
practice, do a mantra and some variation of it
this will magically interrupt the general pattern
of unskillful, thoughtless reactivity. This on
the spot practice can instantly provide a moment
of mindfulness and sanity. It helps you take
better care of yourself, rather than putting
yourself down and it heads off negative
behaviors that we realize we dont want to do,
because such reactions have not really helped us
in the past.
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2. Meditation can be the ultimate therapy to
completely eliminating anger from your mind. In
the beginning, one can do systematic meditations
(like this meditation on anger), but also
meditation on compassion, love and forgiving
reduce anger as well. Ultimately, the realization
of emptiness eradicates all vision like
anger.   3. Patience is the main solution to
anger. As common wisdom says just count to
100... During this time, any of the below methods
can be effective. The most effective method will
depend on the actual situation. Especially in our
age of rush and intense change, patience may not
be seen as a positive quality, but take a minute
to think impatience can easily give rise to a
general feeling of anger. 
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