Christian Dating

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Christian Dating
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Ice Breaker

• This Game is Called 2 Truths and a Lie.
• Each volunteer should tell 2 things that are true
  about themselves and 1 lie about themselves.
• Be sneaky and clever. The class will guess which
  is the lie.
• This is not the time to share your deep dark
  secrets, simple but unusual facts work best.
• Here is an example from my life.

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Unpacking the Ice Breaker

• Unless we are honest in our dating relationships
  about our intentions, our motivations, our
  beliefs, etc we are setting up ourselves and
  others for disappointment and failure.
• A huge portion of relationships involve
  communication.
• If we dont practice telling the truth and
  listening to the truth then we may not spot the
  lies when we see them.
• If we cant spot lies we could end up in dead-end
  relationships that, instead of helping us learn
  to love, become stumbling blocks on our path of
  purity and bad experiences that haunt us later in
  life.

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Opening Prayer

• 2 Volunteers to Read

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Why do we date?

• The modern practice of dating is really less than
  100 years old.
• Before the car was invented a man would court a
  woman in the presence of her family, with the
  hope of marrying her.
• Once the car came around the family was cut out
  of the process, the man would show up and take
  the girl away.
• With the absence of the family dating for the
  purpose of marriage began to fall away.
• Before long dating simply became recreational.

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Recreational Dating

• A person ends up breaking up with each person he
  or she datesexcept for the one who becomes that
  persons spouse.
• Does this sound like good preparation for a
  lifelong marriage?
• Some say, Yes, because you get to see what type
  of person you like and can, therefore, make a
  better choice someday.
• The truth is the downsides tend to outweigh the
  possible benefits.
• If you date for recreation, youre just training
  yourself in the habit of failed relationships.
• So do not date anyone whom you cannot see
  yourself marrying, and never date a person
  expecting that he or she will change.

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The Relationship Pyramid
Intimacy of Sex
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The Relationship Pyramid

• As you could see it begins with the most basic of
  human relationships.
• It culminates in the top which is the expression
  of Free, Total, Fruitful, and Faithful love which
  is sexual intimacy.
• What would happen if you tried to build this
  pyramid upside down trying to balance it on the
  point of the pyramid?
• It would collapse from all the weight at the top.
  At very least it would fall over and get damaged.
• The same thing happens when you begin a
  relationship with sexual activity it doesnt
  work.
• It is contrary to Gods plan for life and love,
  and, in almost all cases, the relationship ends
  up collapsing or really hurting the persons
  involved.

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Marriage? Already?

• Marriage is a huge life decision and vocation,
  both of which require time and discernment.
• As teenagers, your priorities should be on
  school, duty, and fun, leaving these bigger
  questions for adult life.
• But we can begin forming the base of our pyramid
  by making strong friendships
• By getting to know them better.
• By getting to know their families.
• This is good training for when you will meet your
  future spouse and his or her family.

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Chill Out You Wont Become Weird

• Many teens think that something is wrong with
  them because they dont have a boyfriend or
  girlfriend.
• But as much as they might miss having a date on
  Friday night, theyre actually better off in the
  long run.
• When they finish high school, they wont feel
  like theyve been through a teenage soap-opera
  and three emotional divorces.
• Not all high school relationships end in bitter
  break-ups but those who use the time to discover
  who they are have more to offer when it is time
  to seek a spouse.

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How Far is Too Far

• Jason Everett

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Calling in the Reinforcements

• We are naturally inclined to seek what is at the
  top, and that goes for the Relationship Pyramid
  as well.
• When we are tempted to skip levels of the pyramid
  to the top we should be willing to call in
  reinforcements.
• One set of reinforcements will come from God
  through prayer He will give you grace,
  fortitude, purity, and chastity.
• Another set of reinforcements can be friends and
  family Avoiding arranging dates to be alone
• Or plan to be alone in public places or in plain
  sight.
• What is evil we hide in darkness what is good we
  do in the light for all to see.

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Purity

• Finally well say a word about purity.
• Pure gold means that the gold is not mixed with
  any other metals and retains its highest value.
• Purity in relationships means that we dont mix
  selfishness with love.
• When we follow the order of the Relationship
  pyramid we remain pure in our love and
  intentions.
• This way when we do get married well be able to
  offer ourselves at full value, completely, with
  nothing held back.
• That is the love Jesus talks about, The greatest
  act of love is for a man to lay down his life for
  his friend.
• To lay down his life, whole and entire, for his
  bride.

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A Walk to Remember

• Pay attention to Jamies request from Landon

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Small Group Activities

• 20 minutes Clock Appointments
• 10 minutes Dating Game Theory

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www.pureloveclub.net

• Jason Everett Website
• Awesome Info!

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Closing Prayer

• Saints Perpetua and Felicity, please pray with
  me that I , like you both, would have the courage
  to safeguard my purity, especially when others
  are willing to jeopardize my salvation in the
  process. Amen.