Child Rearing

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Child Rearing
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Child Rearing Myths and Realities

• Child rearing is always fun.
• True
• false
• Good parents always produce good kids.
• True
• false

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• Love is the key to effective child rearing.
• True
• False
• Children are always appreciative.
• True
• false

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Do we love them or discipline them?

• Two extremes are
• Just love them and they will be alright.
• Discipline, discipline, discipline

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Parenting Styles

• Diana Baumrind
• Different styles
• Based on similar model as circumplex
• Looks at controlling and loving

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high control
Authoritative
Authoritarian
high love
low love
Permissive
Rejecting
low control
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Authoritative

• High love
• High rules
• Children are
• very self-reliant and cheerful
• cope well with stress
• achievement oriented

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Authoritarian

• Low love
• High rules
• Children are
• moody, unhappy, often unfriendly
• vulnerable to stress

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Permissive

• High love
• Low rules
• Children are
• impulsive-aggressive
• rebellious
• domineering and low achievers

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Rejecting

• Low love
• Low rules
• Children
• have psychological problems
• are immature

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Uninvolved

• Ignore children and let them do what they will as
  long as it does not interfere with parents
  activities.

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Main things a child needs

• love
• rules/boundaries/someone to tell them no
• clear expectations
• consistence in discipline

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Approaches
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Developmental-maturational approach

• Arnold Gesell
• Genetic basis for children passing though
  predictable stages at which time certain
  behaviors are possible.
• Examples
• potty training
• walking

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Behavioral approach

• Skinner
• Behavior is learned
• Example
• time out

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Tough love

• Emphasis on changing behavior, not blaming
• Use positive and negative consequences for
  appropriate behavior
• Withdraw family resource without allowing child
  to exploit parents

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PET

• Gordon
• I - messages
• Win - win conflict resolving
• active listening
• Managing environment to effect change

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Socioteleological

• refers to social striving or seeking a social
  goal
• DR. Eikurs and Alfred Adler
• Focus
• power struggles
• kids misbehave for parental attention
• respect child
• encouragement is important in child rearing

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Reality therapy approach

• William Glasser
• Kids are self-centered and unable to cope with
  stress.

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Should you spank?
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Punishment enhances Reasoning

• The effectiveness of reasoning by itself depends
  on how often reasoning had been combined with
  punishment on other occasions.

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Corporal punishment and physical assaults

• associated with aggression in children.

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Childrens Perceptions of Corporal Punishment
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Six points offered for teaching children

• Prepare
• Learn to communicate
• Encourage
• Involve every child
• Love
• Love children enough to set and maintain limits
  regarding their behavior

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Quality vs. Quantity time
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Why children choose peers over family

• Salutary Recognition
• Small Talk
• Ego Building Comments
• Identity
• Exciting Activities
• Expand Memories
• Consequences (Feedback)
• Girl-Boy Experiences

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Parenting Recommended Resources

• Parent Effectiveness Training
• S.T.E.P. Systematic Training for Effective
  Parenting The Parents Handbook
• Answers A Parents Guidebook for Solving
  Problems
• Manipulating Parents
• Seven Habits of Highly Effective Families
• Teaching Children Values