TAKING CARE OF YOU

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TAKING CARE OF YOU

• Bonnie G. Danowski

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Statistics

• More than 50 million care for the chronically
  ill, disabled or aged family member or friend
  during any given year
• Caregiving is no longer predominantly a womans
  issue. Men now take up 44 of the caregiving
  population.
• Source NFCA Random Sample Survey of family
  caregivers in 2000.

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Arizona Caregivers

• 570,000 caregivers in Arizona
• Provide at least 20 hours care/week
• 385 million hours
• Value of 3.8 billion dollars

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Value

• The value of the services family caregivers
  provide for free is estimated to be 306
  billion a year. That is twice as much as is
  actually spent on homecare and nursing home
  services combined
• Cost to business is 33.6 billion/year Metlife
  2007
• Source Peter S. Arno, Economic Value is
  Informal Caregiving, presented at the Care
  Coordination and the Caregiving Forum, Dept of
  Veterans Affairs, NIH, Bethesda, MD, January
  25-27, 2006.

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Impact

• Those who spend 20 hours of more weekly giving
  care are more likely than others to report loss
  of sleep, loss of appetite, increased pain and
  worsened headaches.
• Evercare, Study of Caregivers in Decline A Close
  Up Look at the Health of Caring for a Loved One.
  Report Findings of 2006, in collaboration with
  the National Alliance For Caregiving,

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Emotional

• Feel allow your feelings
• Learn to recognize, accept, communicate handle
  the difficult emotions about caregiving
• Grieve for your losses
• Dream new dreams
• Learn to foster the many positive feelings about
  caregiving
• Recognize when the negative in you is out of
  control
• Do positive talk
• Join a support group
• Laugh
• Set realistic goals for yourself. Know yourself
• Journal your thoughts and feelings
• Give yourself permission to be imperfect
• See a doctor/professional if you need to
• Engage others

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Spiritual

• See the beauty in nature
• See the beauty in the resilience of the human
  spirit
• Reconnect or strengthen your spirituality through
  meditation
• Spend time with your higher power
• View caregiving as an opportunity
• See your caregiving through the eyes of your
  loved one
• Find enjoyment in the small things
• Celebrate/ritualize events, dates, achievements
• Listen to music/play an instrument/sing
• Often a religious affiliaton provides community
  support and helps to make sense and give meaning
  to your life

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Physical

• Reduce bodily tension through relaxation, humor,
  exercise, good nutrition, yoga, massage, sleep,
  rest
• Get regular medical check-ups

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Mental

• Study, read, stay mentally challenged
• Find interesting people to explore new ideas
• Do memory enhancing work
• Exercise critical thinking
• Get your finances under control
• Make no major decisions when feeling most
  vulnerable
• As difficult as it is, plan respite each year
• Learn about your loved ones condition
• Be prepared for the future
• PLAY!!!!!!!

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Grief

• S/he has what?
• I heard it, but I dont like it.
• If only
• No, its not going to go away.
• I want our/my life back.

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S/he has what?

• Shock
• Denial
• Numbness
• Disbelief
• Disoriented

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I heard it but I dont like it.

• Resentment
• Anger
• Emptiness
• Helplessness
• Fatigue

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If only

• Confusion
• Uncertainty
• Anxiety
• Alienation
• Hostility

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No, its not going to go away.

• Fear
• Depression
• Isolation
• Loneliness
• Panic
• Guilt

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I want our/my life back.

• Acceptance
• Hope
• Confidence
• Forgiveness
• Balance
• Opportunity

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Why is it difficult to ask for help?

• Accustomed to doing things on your own
• Weakness
• Failure
• Undeserving of a break
• Low feelings of worth
• No one can do it like I can
• Why not ask? Self worth, necessary

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What happens if you dont ask for help?

• Depression continues and worsens
• Unmanageable life and lifestyle
• Physical and physiological problems
• IF YOU DO restore to normality

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What would it mean if you did ask for help?

• D- down with denial
• E- expression feelings
• A- acceptance of your limitations
• L- look for support
• Health and freedom

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What could happen if you accepted support?

• A- accepting (of thing you have no control over)
• W- willingness (to try new ways of coping)
• E- empowered to care for your needs too
• S- serenity can be achieved
• O- outsource tasks of your choice
• M- manage your own life
• E- express rather than suppress

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A Product of Relief

• H- healing is allowed to begin
• O- open to help
• P-positive permission-giving thoughts
• E- empowered to put your needs first

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Tips for Family Caregivers

• Reward yourself with respite breaks often
• Watch out for signs of depression
• Accept the offer for help
• Educate yourself about your loved ones condition
• Be open to technologies and ideas
• Trust your instincts
• Be good to your back. Be good to you
• Speak up for your rights
• Seek Support
• Grieve for your losses and allow yourself to
• Dream New Dreams

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And

• Learn use stress-reduction techniques
• Attend to your own healthcare needs
• Get proper rest and nutrition
• Exercise regularly
• Take time off without feeling guilty
• Participate in pleasant, nurturing activities
• Seek supportive counseling, talk to a friend
• Identify acknowledge your feelings
• Change negative thinking
• Set goals.

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Finally

• ITS UP TO YOU!

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Resources

• www.thefamilycaregiver.org
• www.azcaregivercoalition.org
• www.azrespite.org
• bjdanowski_at_cox.net