Your Laguna Horoscope

1
Your Laguna Horoscope

• By your assisting advisors
• Talon Sauerwein
• Eric Lipes

2
You may think that

• That the principal is EVIL!!!
• That the eighth-graders will beat you up. Or just
  throw you in the trash can.

3
Or maybe that

• The food is as bad as your moms (thats usually
  alive).
• Or that you have to take a shower with other
  students.

4
Maybe even that

• Your locker will get jammed.
• Or that youll have 4 hours of homework.

5
But really

• The Principal is just an alien out to take over
  the world!
• The eighth-graders just have nothing better to
  do. Plus you find cool stuff in the trash can.

6
Dont worry

• Lagunas food is.
• Well lets just say it wont kill you( most of the
  time).
• And you dont need to take showers with other
  students, unless you want to, YUCK!

7
Youll see that

• Your locker does get jammed. Dont worry someone
  will help. And if theyre losers too then just
  kick it a couple of times. Trust me it works.
• You dont have 4 hours of homework. Phew! YOU
  HAVE 5!!! HA HA!

8
Some good things are that

• If you get Mr. Coward then you can play cool
  video games during lunch or before school.
• If you get an F in English, dont worry you can
  go to summer-school instead of repeating 7th
  grade (Talon).

9
Another good thing is

• Laguna has two lunch lines so you can choose the
  line thats the shortest to get lunch sooner.
• They have a ton of basket-ball courts so you can
  play with people your level

10
Some helpful hints and tips are

• If you get Mrs.. Heck then change out of the
  classroom as soon as you can or feel her wrath.
• Always no your friends schedules so you can meet
  them between classes to chat.
• There is a locker-check at the end of the year so
  dont use tape. Un less you want to spend your
  Saturday cleaning it up.
• Try to fit some of your homework on the bus or
  during home-base.

11
Laguna Rocks!
12
Check list

• About 352 words
• 6 you may think that
• 6 But really this
• 4 good things
• 4 hints and tips
• By Eric Lipes and Talon Sauerwein