ABUSE

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ABUSE

• It devastates the victim
• It does not stop on its own
• Silence allows the abuse to continue

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ABUSIVE HOMES

• Everyone in abusive homes walks on eggshells,
  hoping to keep the abuser on even keel
• The children learn to sacrifice their joy and
  development to prevent tension and violence.
• They live their parents lives, not their own
• They have no behavioral anchors ---
  under-developed sense of normal, loving behavior.
  
• They have low self-esteem and feel of no value
• Child abuse thrives on silence/secrecy

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TYPES OF ABUSE

• EMOTIONAL
• NEGLECT
• PHYSICAL
• SEXUAL

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KNOWLEDGE HELPS
Bringing up children can, at times, be stressful,
demanding, frustrating, tiring
Being aware of common situations and scenarios
that cause these problems. Developing an eye
to recognize possible dangers can help parents
avoid many of the traps, and help children
develop in a healthy positive manner.
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CHIDREN AT RISK
A child whose care may pose difficulties

• Handicapped physically or mentally
• Colicky or illness prone
• Hyperactive
• Demanding, unusual need for attention
• Infant with feeding difficulties
• Exceptionally bright child
• Previously abused child

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CHIDREN AT RISK
A child who is thought to be difficult

• Child of wrong sex
• Unwanted child
• Child seen as ugly, stupid, willful, bad even
  though he/she is normal
• Child whose birth caused particular problems
  for parents
• Child has physical/personality characteristics
  that remind the caretaker of their abuser

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RISK ASSESMENT Caretaker

• Immaturity
• Young and/or insecure adults may have a difficult
  time understanding a childs behavior and needs.
  Their own need to be cared for is so great that
  they may be unable to take care of the needs of
  the child
• Lack of parenting skills
• Adults who have had poor models for family
  relationships may have a far more difficult time
  providing a healthy environment for the children

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• Unrealistic expectations
• Adults who do not understand normal stages of
  development in children may expect them to behave
  in ways beyond their developmental capabilities
• Unmet emotional needs
• Adults who do not relate well to other adults may
  expect children to satisfy their needs for love,
  protection, self-esteem, sexual gratification
• Isolation
• Adults who have no support system, who are
  geographically or emotionally separated from
  family and friends, may take out their
  frustrations on children

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• Substance abuse
• Alcohol or drug abuse limit abilities to properly
  care for children
• Mental illness or development delay
• Adults with unstable psychological makeup or low
  intelligence may not function fully or understand
  parent responsibilities
• Poor impulse control

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• An Accumulation of small stresses
• Fairly chaotic life-style
• Regularly having problems
• Major disruptions in life
• Death of a loved one
• Divorce
• Loss of job/income
• significant illness to them or near relative

AVOID PARANOIA LEARN TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN
ABUSIVE AND NORMAL SITUATIONS
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SAFE PEOPLE

• Dont laugh at you or belittle you
• Dont blab things told in confidence
• Dont abuse alcohol or drugs
• Show concern and care
• Spend time with you
• Listen to your concerns and pay attention
• Share their feelings with you
• Keep their word and follow up on promises
• Are always positive and encouraging

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LONG TERM EFFECTS

• Low self-esteem
• Not trusting of others
• Risky lifestyle
• Substance abuse
• Abusive, violent, behavior
• Extreme depression
• Suicide

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TEACHING THE BASICS

• This is your body -- no one else has any rights
  to it
• Dont teach blind obedience to adults
• Knowing Good touch and Bad touch
• How to move away from abusive situations
• Yelling at, hitting, belittling are not normal
• Parents behavioral problems are not your fault
• Children flourish in an encouraging, loving, and
  trusting environment

SEEK HELP IMMEDIATELY
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ACT EARLY

• Abuse is devastating for child and family
• Abuse does not stop on its own
• Damaging effects of repeated abuse accumulate
• Abused children have very severe problems
  (physical/emotional/behavioral) in later life

SEEK HELP IMMEDIATELY
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SUGGESTED READING

• Wednesdays Children, Suzanne Somers