The Arbinger Institute

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RESOLVING GROUP CONFLICT

• The Arbinger Institute

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The Cost of Group Conflict
Cost to individuals Cost to leadership Cost to
organisation
Creativity and morale Focus on internal
battles Financial Performance
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People Problems in conflict situations

• Mistrust

• Low Motivation

• Finger-pointing

• Cynicism

• Sagging Morale

• Weak Teams

• Apathy
• Excuse-making

• Ineffective Managers

• Silo Mentalities

• Turf Wars
• Cross-functional conflict

• Slow Problem-solving

• Chronic
  Miscommunication
• Non-accountability

• Non-Productivity

• Sluggish Execution

If they are separate problems, then
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.They Need Separate Solutions
Many, Various People Problems Hurt
Organizational Performance
A Training Programme for every Problem
But all people problems are just symptoms of
one underlying problem
a problem that people cannot see
a problem that devours organisational resources
and destroys results
by causing us to focus on ourselves and our
individual needs, causing conflict between
individuals, teams, and whole functions
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Self Deception

• The condition of (a) being a problem and (b) not
  knowing that were a problem.
• We
• Create problems
• Cant see that we create problems innocent
• Think others create problems
• Feel justified
• So resist improvement

Like living in a box
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LIFE IN THE BOX OF SELF DECEPTION

• Exaggerate others faults
• Blame and feel victimized
• Inflate values/principles that
• justify ones conduct
• Insist on ones rightness
• Feel Justified
• Focus on myself and my sacrifice
• Remain blind to the Boxto ones
• own role in causing problems

The Experience of Self Deception
In the box I am A War Waiting to Happen
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We can do any behaviour in two ways

• Coaching

• Recruiting

• Serving Customers

• Re-structuring

• Leading

• Taking part in meetings

Behaviour Going on Holiday

• Selling

• Giving Appraisals

• Hiring and firing

• Measuring and creating targets

Arbinger
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Example Going on Holiday
3. Rachel does- Complains about Chris coffee
cups/rubbish 7. Shows up Dads weaknesses to
kids, blames him for map.. 2. Rachel
sees- Blaming, aggressive, here we go
again 6. Competitor, petty, wrong
4. Chris sees- Fault-finding, does not
appreciate my packing, contribution etc 8. Poor
team player, bad wife, disloyal 1. Chris
does- Says come on, were going to be late 5.
Insists on his route, recruits the kids
How can anything change?
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Self-deception undermines results
Armies build
The box spreads across the organisation
and takes our energy and focus away from
results in ways unimaginable
all the time telling us exactly the opposite!
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Individual Example Restructuring
3. Employee does- Builds case for work, resists
closure, recruits 7. RIGHT. Undermines
management and organisation 2. Employee
sees- My work is not valued 6. Threat,
disloyal, Organisation is WRONG
4. Management sees- Obstructive, not committed
to results 8. Untrustworthy, no obligation,
threat 1. Management does- Announces closure of
department 5. Justifies, withdraws help, terse
communications
..the circumstances themselves (loss of job)
provoke war. but they do not insist on it
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Team Example Integrating a new software solution
throughout the organisation
3. Work team does- Builds case for status quo,
laughs at IT 7. Finds fault, breaks software,
gathers allies 2. Work team sees- More
change, IT is arrogant, disruptive, this wont
work 6. Patronising, out of touch
4. IT team sees- Unappreciative, slow,
resistant, stupid, backwoodsman 8. See? We
were right 1. IT team does- Announces new
software solution 5.Trains internal clients
condescendingly
..the circumstances themselves (new systems)
provoke war. but they do not insist on it
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Organisational Example The Solution - Brand
Player and Client Team
3. Client team does- Excludes Brand Player from
inner circle 7. Undermine value of simple
product bid in clients eyes 2. Client team
sees- Threat to solution and client value 6.
Brand Player as a competitor
4. Brand Player Sees- Client Team as a threat to
revenue and bonus 8. Untrustworthy
deal-breaker 1. Brand Player Does- Questions
time to contract and brand revenue priority 5.
Develops alternative single brand bid
..the circumstances themselves (time targets)
provoke war. but they do not insist on it
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Outline your conflict
3. I do 2. I see

• 4. They see
• They do-
• (something that bothers me)

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CORE SOLUTION
Core Solution Getting out of the Box
Core Problem The Box
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Can we cure Self Deception?

• T H R E E P H A S E CURE
• Individual
• Team
• Organisation

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Turnaround situations IndividualThe Government
Agency

• - Seamless transition towards closure of agency
• - Briefed client organisations
• - Pass on Best-Practice

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Turnaround situations Team Integrating New
Software Application

• - 330 million invested over 2 years, to cover
  all 11,000 employees
• - 300 Arbinger-trained project leaders, focussed
  on Way of Being
• Never before has an internal project had this
  kind of performance. The success of the
  implementation was not just about integrating the
  changes in our team we had to change the hearts
  and minds of everyone.. We came in ahead of
  schedule and under budget

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Turnaround situations Organisation Brand
Player and Client Team

• Establish and apply common values  'dedication to
  every clients success' 'trust and responsibility
  in all relationships'
• Focus 'account planning' on ensuring IT supports
  the clients business strategy rather than just
  our quarterly targets
• Align brand players to client teams and include
  them in strategy and planning activities, not
  just opportunities

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An Organisation In The Box

• I become preoccupied with proving how much better
  I am than others
• I blame the system and hide behind it, rather
  than finding solutions
• The service I give the client suffers because of
  weak team work and organisational politics
• My performance suffers as does the performance of
  my colleagues and the entire organisation

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An Organisation Out of the Box Improves
Performance and Results because

• Employees focus on the experience they are
  delivering to different people
• Their co-workers
• Their staff
• Their customers
• The organisation
• As a result
• Cooperation, trust and mutual respect improve
  tremendously at all levels
• Business performance improves significantly

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How can we solve organisational problems when
our hearts are at war as individuals?

• Which one of my relationships could be improved?
• What is it costing my life, to carry my heart at
  war towards this person?
• What is it like to feel my distain, my
  resistance, my blame, my punishing?
• How much do I prize my innocence in this
  relationship? What do I think I have to lose by
  softening my heart towards them?
• Do I know of this persons burdens, troubles,
  hopes and dreams?
• What resources and potential are we wasting from
  continuing this conflict?
• Who have I recruited as my army?
• How long is this going to go on?